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Women Only
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I've created a monster. I'm only 21 but I've been with my boyfriend for 6 years. I have no contact with anyone but him. A mere glace from a passing stranger is enough to set him off. I jump at his every command so he doesn't snap. We have no income, no friends, no anything but this rotting carcass of a relationship. I fear for my life on a daily basis, not because he beats me though. He plays all kinds of mind games but his main weapon is driving me around. He'll go over 120mph and take his hands off the wheel when he's mad me, not to mention getting the passenger side with in inches of hitting what we're passing when he's in bad mood.
And then there's his mother. Their bedrooms are 3 feet apart with no doors. She's seriously fucked up in the head, she's brain damaged from abuse but her brother told me she's always had the mind of a 12 year old. I find her nasty bleach blonde hairs in his bed and her cig butts in his ashtray. She's a hoarder who never leaves the house except to go to the emergency rooms for what ever bullshit she's using to get pity. No matter what she does, he finds no motivation to move out. Lately when she does something crazy, like break into his lock box or dig through his trash can he literally will start ranting and raving "You people! These fucking women! Everyone in my life is out to destroy me! All of you fucking bitches...." He does this while making eye contact with me and no matter how much I plead for him to remember it's just her doing these things he gradually starts blaming me more and more.
I stay for a number of reasons
1. I've tried to leave before and he attempted suicide.
2. I'm arrogant enough to think I'm the best thing that will ever happen to him.
3. I need him for food and weed.
4. I'm punishing myself for being a bad girlfriend and bad person in general.
5. Although I may be physically attractive, I'm insane and have all kinds of social problems, that he's willing to deal with.
I have cheated on him, with 2 men who don't live with a mother that's trying to fuck them and are actually attractive. I found them to save me. I enticed them and gave them my body, wishing desperately they would want my heart, want to be knight in shining armor. No man could ever want that. I will forever be the whore chained to the beast.
And then there's his mother. Their bedrooms are 3 feet apart with no doors. She's seriously fucked up in the head, she's brain damaged from abuse but her brother told me she's always had the mind of a 12 year old. I find her nasty bleach blonde hairs in his bed and her cig butts in his ashtray. She's a hoarder who never leaves the house except to go to the emergency rooms for what ever bullshit she's using to get pity. No matter what she does, he finds no motivation to move out. Lately when she does something crazy, like break into his lock box or dig through his trash can he literally will start ranting and raving "You people! These fucking women! Everyone in my life is out to destroy me! All of you fucking bitches...." He does this while making eye contact with me and no matter how much I plead for him to remember it's just her doing these things he gradually starts blaming me more and more.
I stay for a number of reasons
1. I've tried to leave before and he attempted suicide.
2. I'm arrogant enough to think I'm the best thing that will ever happen to him.
3. I need him for food and weed.
4. I'm punishing myself for being a bad girlfriend and bad person in general.
5. Although I may be physically attractive, I'm insane and have all kinds of social problems, that he's willing to deal with.
I have cheated on him, with 2 men who don't live with a mother that's trying to fuck them and are actually attractive. I found them to save me. I enticed them and gave them my body, wishing desperately they would want my heart, want to be knight in shining armor. No man could ever want that. I will forever be the whore chained to the beast.
