It was my 30th birthday. I was depressed. How could my 20s be over? I was ready to stay at home in sweats and drink myself into a coma when my boyfriend at the time insisted that I get out of the house. We decided to go downtown to a martini bar.
I picked a relatively empty, dark corner of the bar, sat down and promptly ordered two house specialties-apple martinis-from the bartender. "Tough day?" he asked. "Tough year," I told him, "I turned 30 today. Look, there's a huge tip in this for you if you don't let either one of these glasses get empty."
So there I was, sitting at the bar, pounding martinis in record speed, when some chick walked up and sat on the bar stool next to me. As is my habit, I checked her out. I think women actually check each other out more than men check us out. She was attractive, fit, self-assured. Over 30. "Well, if she can still look that good over 30 maybe there's hope for me yet. I'd do her," I thought to myself and downed the last of a martini before the bartender swooped in with another shaker to refill.
I started to dive into the fresh 'tini when the chick next to me said hi. I turned towards her and, over the rim of my glass, winked at her as I sipped. "Hi," I finally managed to blurt out. She introduced herself, "I'm Josefina." Pronounced "HO-sefina". "What a horrible name!" I thought. I wondered if she had trouble picking up guys with a horrible name like that. I also wondered why the hell she was wearing a suit jacket, buttoned up, but obviously with nothing on underneath it. It was kinda hot but also kinda Joan Collins circa 1986. It did afford me a great cleavage shot though and she did have great tits so I just took it all in. Must be how she compensates for that cock-block of a name.
"I'm Emily," I informed her, shaking her well-manicured hand. I saw her eyeing the several pairs of empty martini glasses lined up on the bar in front of me along with the two filled ones. "I'm not an alcoholic. Most days," I deadpanned, "It's just that I turned 30 today and I'm a little depressed." "So you've been two-fisting martinis…& quot; she nodded understandingly. "Pretty much all afternoon!" I said, suddenly proud of my alcohol tolerance level. We laughed. She was hot. "Well happy birthday," she wished me. I was about to find out just how happy it would be…
I was fixated on Josefina's ample bosom. I just wanted to touch them… Now, my girlfriends-as in female friends-know that I have a habit of grabbing their tits when I've been drinking. Call it tit envy, I have all the derrière you can handle but sorely lack tits so I'm probably about as fascinated by them as a pubescent boy. My tact clouded by a sea of sour mix and vodka, I was probably not as adept, however, at concealing my leering because a wicked grin spread across Josefina's face as she, without a word, reached down, unbuttoned her jacket and let her tits spill forth in their full glory. If I had a dick, I'd have had to readjust. As it were my lady regions pleasantly tingled.
"You're not wearing a bra," I said matter-of-factly as I casually reached out and cupped the very generous handfuls of flesh before me. She shook her head, "No." "Well, I have a secret," I said leaning forward towards her, "I'm not wearing any panties." "No?" she asked, raising an eyebrow as I continued to fondle her breasts. "Nope," I confirmed. "See, I was planning on getting good and sloppy drunk and then fucking the shit out of my boyfriend in the car on the way home and, you know, when you're in a state like that, panties just get in the way, don't they?" "Can I see?" she asked. I took my eyes off her breasts just long enough to look her straight in the eye and nod my consent.
I slid my ass forward on the bar stool as she placed her hands on my knees and then slid them up my thighs, pushing the skirt up with them. As she reached the top of my thighs I spread my legs so she could get a good look. "No, you are not wearing any! And someone just got waxed too," she practically squealed. Before I knew it, with her tits still hanging out, she slid off her stool, knelt down in front of me and looked up at me to wish me happy birthday again before she put her head between my legs, parted my lips with her tongue and ran it over my clit. "Oh FFFFUCK!" I moaned as I simultaneously grabbed her head and threw mine back.
After a few minutes I was about to cum when another chick suddenly rushed up beside us, put her hands on her hips and shouted, "Jesus Christ, Josefina, what the FUCK are you doing?!" Unfortunately this prompted Josefina to leave me hanging as she looked up at this angry chick from between my legs and said, "Oh, hey, baby. It's her birthday." Then she looked at me and introduced angry chick as her girlfriend, Claudia. Sipping my martini I thought, "Oh shit… This should be good." I was ready for some chick drama. Instead Claudia seemed amazingly calm and authoritative, instructing Josefina to get off her knees, "Get outta there, baby, you know I'm better at that than you." Josefina stood up, put her tits away and shook her head as she told me, "She's so fucking competitive."
No sooner was Josefina out from between my legs than did Claudia step right in. She pushed my knees as far apart as they would go and took a good long look at my sopping wet pussy. "Now," she said, "Let's see about this birthday pussy." Not gonna lie, she kinda scared me but she kinda made my pussy pulse too so I braced myself. Good thing I did because this bitch rammed what felt like her entire fist up inside my cunt while she grabbed me by the back of my head and tongued my fucking tonsils!
When she was done performing her simultaneous tonsillectomy/hysterectomy on me, she withdrew her forearm from my vag and proceeded to suck her fingers. I needed a fucking drink. She then announced, "Now, I'm gonna show you how pussy SHOULD be eaten." I was scared for the safety of my ovaries. Josefina saw my eyes widen in disbelief as Claudia lowered herself in front of me. She whispered in my ear, "Don't be scared. She does it real good, I promise." Somehow her bare breast was back in my hand and we were gently kissing when I realized that Claudia had begun licking my pussy. She did do it real good. It wasn't long before I was quivering in orgasm.
When General Claudia ordered Josefina and me to follow her into the ladies' room, I complied. Once in the restroom Claudia closed and locked the door and started digging into her bag for something. Josefina distracted me with her tits. Sucking face with her and her tits I was only vaguely aware of Claudia fucking around under my skirt. What the fuck was she doing under there??? I felt like something was stuffed in my cunt-did the sick bitch insert a tampon or something?
She finally came up for air and instructed Josefina to take my skirt off. She obediently unzipped it and worked it down over my hips, then Claudia turned me around to face the mirror. I had a fucking penis! The fucking cunt had strapped one on me! I felt like a scene out of Silence of the Lambs. I wondered if Claudia would next instruct me to put the lotion in the basket! I was semi-horrified and semi-turned on at the same time. What the fuck was I gonna do with this?
Meanwhile, Claudia had jumped up on the counter, legs spread, and Josefina was bent over, eating her out. I noticed she still had on her suit jacket, tits spilling out, but she was suddenly missing her pants, her bare ass now in full glory. Between moans and gasps Claudia ordered me to fuck Josefina from behind. Josefina momentarily stopped what she was doing, ran her fingers through the wetness of Claudia's pussy and then reached down between her legs and ran her wet fingers along her own cunt. She looked back at me, spread her legs wider and said, "I'm ready."
Now, I'd like to say I went through with it, but the fact of the matter is, I was kinda freaked out. But still horny as hell. "Girls, this is nice and all but I really need some cock. REAL cock." I asked for help taking the strap-on off. Fucked if I knew how that thing worked! I got my skirt back on and headed out to the bar to find my boyfriend.
"What the hell were you guys doing in there? Are you ok?" he asked. "Yeah, fine and maybe in about five years I'll be over the trauma enough to tell you what happened in there. Right now I really need your cock so let's go!" "Oh, ok!" he agreed.
My boyfriend and I left the bar and once we were in the car I climbed on top of him and fucked him blind. The next morning it dawned on me, I think he paid those bitches…
I picked a relatively empty, dark corner of the bar, sat down and promptly ordered two house specialties-apple martinis-from the bartender. "Tough day?" he asked. "Tough year," I told him, "I turned 30 today. Look, there's a huge tip in this for you if you don't let either one of these glasses get empty."
So there I was, sitting at the bar, pounding martinis in record speed, when some chick walked up and sat on the bar stool next to me. As is my habit, I checked her out. I think women actually check each other out more than men check us out. She was attractive, fit, self-assured. Over 30. "Well, if she can still look that good over 30 maybe there's hope for me yet. I'd do her," I thought to myself and downed the last of a martini before the bartender swooped in with another shaker to refill.
I started to dive into the fresh 'tini when the chick next to me said hi. I turned towards her and, over the rim of my glass, winked at her as I sipped. "Hi," I finally managed to blurt out. She introduced herself, "I'm Josefina." Pronounced "HO-sefina". "What a horrible name!" I thought. I wondered if she had trouble picking up guys with a horrible name like that. I also wondered why the hell she was wearing a suit jacket, buttoned up, but obviously with nothing on underneath it. It was kinda hot but also kinda Joan Collins circa 1986. It did afford me a great cleavage shot though and she did have great tits so I just took it all in. Must be how she compensates for that cock-block of a name.
"I'm Emily," I informed her, shaking her well-manicured hand. I saw her eyeing the several pairs of empty martini glasses lined up on the bar in front of me along with the two filled ones. "I'm not an alcoholic. Most days," I deadpanned, "It's just that I turned 30 today and I'm a little depressed." "So you've been two-fisting martinis…& quot; she nodded understandingly. "Pretty much all afternoon!" I said, suddenly proud of my alcohol tolerance level. We laughed. She was hot. "Well happy birthday," she wished me. I was about to find out just how happy it would be…
I was fixated on Josefina's ample bosom. I just wanted to touch them… Now, my girlfriends-as in female friends-know that I have a habit of grabbing their tits when I've been drinking. Call it tit envy, I have all the derrière you can handle but sorely lack tits so I'm probably about as fascinated by them as a pubescent boy. My tact clouded by a sea of sour mix and vodka, I was probably not as adept, however, at concealing my leering because a wicked grin spread across Josefina's face as she, without a word, reached down, unbuttoned her jacket and let her tits spill forth in their full glory. If I had a dick, I'd have had to readjust. As it were my lady regions pleasantly tingled.
"You're not wearing a bra," I said matter-of-factly as I casually reached out and cupped the very generous handfuls of flesh before me. She shook her head, "No." "Well, I have a secret," I said leaning forward towards her, "I'm not wearing any panties." "No?" she asked, raising an eyebrow as I continued to fondle her breasts. "Nope," I confirmed. "See, I was planning on getting good and sloppy drunk and then fucking the shit out of my boyfriend in the car on the way home and, you know, when you're in a state like that, panties just get in the way, don't they?" "Can I see?" she asked. I took my eyes off her breasts just long enough to look her straight in the eye and nod my consent.
I slid my ass forward on the bar stool as she placed her hands on my knees and then slid them up my thighs, pushing the skirt up with them. As she reached the top of my thighs I spread my legs so she could get a good look. "No, you are not wearing any! And someone just got waxed too," she practically squealed. Before I knew it, with her tits still hanging out, she slid off her stool, knelt down in front of me and looked up at me to wish me happy birthday again before she put her head between my legs, parted my lips with her tongue and ran it over my clit. "Oh FFFFUCK!" I moaned as I simultaneously grabbed her head and threw mine back.
After a few minutes I was about to cum when another chick suddenly rushed up beside us, put her hands on her hips and shouted, "Jesus Christ, Josefina, what the FUCK are you doing?!" Unfortunately this prompted Josefina to leave me hanging as she looked up at this angry chick from between my legs and said, "Oh, hey, baby. It's her birthday." Then she looked at me and introduced angry chick as her girlfriend, Claudia. Sipping my martini I thought, "Oh shit… This should be good." I was ready for some chick drama. Instead Claudia seemed amazingly calm and authoritative, instructing Josefina to get off her knees, "Get outta there, baby, you know I'm better at that than you." Josefina stood up, put her tits away and shook her head as she told me, "She's so fucking competitive."
No sooner was Josefina out from between my legs than did Claudia step right in. She pushed my knees as far apart as they would go and took a good long look at my sopping wet pussy. "Now," she said, "Let's see about this birthday pussy." Not gonna lie, she kinda scared me but she kinda made my pussy pulse too so I braced myself. Good thing I did because this bitch rammed what felt like her entire fist up inside my cunt while she grabbed me by the back of my head and tongued my fucking tonsils!
When she was done performing her simultaneous tonsillectomy/hysterectomy on me, she withdrew her forearm from my vag and proceeded to suck her fingers. I needed a fucking drink. She then announced, "Now, I'm gonna show you how pussy SHOULD be eaten." I was scared for the safety of my ovaries. Josefina saw my eyes widen in disbelief as Claudia lowered herself in front of me. She whispered in my ear, "Don't be scared. She does it real good, I promise." Somehow her bare breast was back in my hand and we were gently kissing when I realized that Claudia had begun licking my pussy. She did do it real good. It wasn't long before I was quivering in orgasm.
When General Claudia ordered Josefina and me to follow her into the ladies' room, I complied. Once in the restroom Claudia closed and locked the door and started digging into her bag for something. Josefina distracted me with her tits. Sucking face with her and her tits I was only vaguely aware of Claudia fucking around under my skirt. What the fuck was she doing under there??? I felt like something was stuffed in my cunt-did the sick bitch insert a tampon or something?
She finally came up for air and instructed Josefina to take my skirt off. She obediently unzipped it and worked it down over my hips, then Claudia turned me around to face the mirror. I had a fucking penis! The fucking cunt had strapped one on me! I felt like a scene out of Silence of the Lambs. I wondered if Claudia would next instruct me to put the lotion in the basket! I was semi-horrified and semi-turned on at the same time. What the fuck was I gonna do with this?
Meanwhile, Claudia had jumped up on the counter, legs spread, and Josefina was bent over, eating her out. I noticed she still had on her suit jacket, tits spilling out, but she was suddenly missing her pants, her bare ass now in full glory. Between moans and gasps Claudia ordered me to fuck Josefina from behind. Josefina momentarily stopped what she was doing, ran her fingers through the wetness of Claudia's pussy and then reached down between her legs and ran her wet fingers along her own cunt. She looked back at me, spread her legs wider and said, "I'm ready."
Now, I'd like to say I went through with it, but the fact of the matter is, I was kinda freaked out. But still horny as hell. "Girls, this is nice and all but I really need some cock. REAL cock." I asked for help taking the strap-on off. Fucked if I knew how that thing worked! I got my skirt back on and headed out to the bar to find my boyfriend.
"What the hell were you guys doing in there? Are you ok?" he asked. "Yeah, fine and maybe in about five years I'll be over the trauma enough to tell you what happened in there. Right now I really need your cock so let's go!" "Oh, ok!" he agreed.
My boyfriend and I left the bar and once we were in the car I climbed on top of him and fucked him blind. The next morning it dawned on me, I think he paid those bitches…
