I'm now 22 and in college. When I was a 14 year old girl, I had a very embarrassing encounter with my father. At the time, I was just discovering sex and my own body, but was intensely curious about boy's bodies. I didn't have any brothers and, at that age, I didn't associate with boys at school. I was very curious what a boy's penis looked and felt like.

My mother worked for the airlines and traveled a lot. I often spent nights home alone with my dad. At the time we lived in the rural Midwest which is often subject to intense thunderstorms. Sometimes on those nights, I would sleep in bed with my dad.

One particular night, we had had pizza for dinner and had just finished watching a movie. I can't remember the movie now, but I do recall that there were some sexy scenes. I felt very aroused and my body felt hot and very flushed. A storm was raging outside, so I asked daddy if I could sleep with him - and I actually asked it like that, "daddy, can I sleep with you?" Right after I said it, I felt embarrassed but a little thrilled that I had asked it that way. Naturally, daddy said yes and told me to take the dishes downstairs and get ready for bed.

I honestly wasn't thinking anything sexual toward my father, but I felt very aroused in general. I wanted to feel sexy. I imagined instead (I think because of my verbal slip) that I was getting ready to go to bed with my lover, like I saw in the movie.

I decided that I would wear something sexy to bed, but I didn't own any lingerie at that age. Instead, I pulled out a thong that was very lacy in the front and picked out a tank top that barely went past my hips. I spent a lot of time preparing myself in the bathroom, posing in front of the mirror. My nipples were very hard and clearly showing through my top.

Dad was already in bed and only the nightstand lamp was on. I slipped into bed very slowly, trying to do it in a way that I thought was sexy. My dad wasn't really looking at me though and shut out the light when I had finally wiggled myself into bed next to him. He kissed me good night and rolled over to go to sleep.

I lay there for a while on my back with my legs slightly spread thinking of my lover kneeling between my legs. I was breathing hard. I rolled over onto my stomach and was gently grinding my hips against the bed. After a few minutes of this, my dad was annoyed and told me to settle down. I think he thought I couldn't sleep and was just rolling around. I quietly asked if I could cuddle with him. Grudgingly he relented and I scooted to his side of the bed and wrapped my arm around his broad chest. I got a thrill from pressing my almost nude breasts against his back.

We went to sleep that way. At some point in the night, I woke up in what I can only describe as a violent state of arousal. We had shifted positions and my dad now lay facing me with his arm thrown across my chest. But what I noticed most was something poking me in the thigh. I reached down to feel what it was...it turned out to be my father's erect penis poking through the front of his boxers.

By this time I was trembling. My right hand was wrapped around my father's penis; I didn't want to let go of it. I desperately wanted to rub it between my legs, but was scared to move. I didn't want my father to wake up and move away from me. So we lay in the position for a long time. I was gently stroking his erection.

And then I had a thought. I could just barely reach the moisturizer my mother kept on her nightstand. I put some in my hand and reached down to put it on my dad's erection. I didn't even think about what I was doing.

I remember feeling it throb in my hand. I continued to gently rub the head of his penis. I loved the feel of it - there was an urgency to it. It grew harder as I gently and carefully stroked played with it. Suddenly, my dad groaned slightly, his hips bucked and...I shrieked! I felt something hot and wet land on leg. My hand was sticky.

As a father, I can't imagine what he must have thought waking up at that moment. He had just ejaculated on his nearly naked 14 year old daughter. I was covered in semen and crying. At first he was consoling and quickly jumped out of bed to get a washcloth. There was a very awkward moment as he helped me out of my top to help wipe his own ejaculate off my stomach and breasts.

It slowly became obvious what I had done. At least I can joke that I was caught red handed. But at the time, it wasn't funny. I had never seen my dad so angry. He'd never raised a hand to me in all my years growing up. But in one swift movement I was over his knee. He spanked me hard a few times. It really stung, but I was more afraid of his anger than anything else.

He quickly stopped spanking me when he noticed my thong. I think that was the last straw. He violently tore it off of me. Despite being terribly afraid, that one moment was the most sexually thrilling thing to ever happen to me. He bent me over his knee again and started spanking me. I loved it! I was sobbing, but I was also panting heavily. Impulsively I made one more rash move. I pushed my hips up as his hand came down on my bare bottom and wiggled my legs apart, exposing my very wet labia. I felt really embarrassed, but didn't feel as if I could control what I was doing. Somehow, I wanted to show him how excited I was.

He got it. He stopped spanking me, picked me up and gently laid down on the bed. I lay panting desperately and soaked in sweat. I felt his hands on my knees, gently prying my legs apart. I gasped. He gently took my hand and placed it between my legs. He took my first fingers, gently pressed them against my clit and rubbed in a circular motion. Finally, he slid them down and pressed them against the opening of my vagina. And with that he quickly got up, walked out of the room, closed the door and left me to pleasure myself.

My father slept in the guest bedroom that night. I did end up masturbating and had about three orgasms before drifting off to sleep. There was a lot more fallout from the incident. It was a really big deal when my mom got home. He told her everything except that he showed me how to masturbate myself. I ended up in therapy for nearly a year afterward. My dad came to some of the sessions where he related the whole story when my mom wasn't present. That was extremely embarrassing for both of us. I admitted in front of the therapist that when my dad spread my legs, I felt vulnerable; I would have had sex with him if he wanted. Now that I'm an adult, we haven't talked about it since. I'm sure he still thinks about it. I know that I do.