I keep having this reoccurring dream. I walk to the store and my best friend's dad is putting gas in their RV. He asks if I need a ride and I say sure and then we drive to a secluded parking lot and he walks to the back where the bed is. He tells me to follow. When I'm back there he closes the door and tells me to suck his dick. I tell him I don't think I'm allowed and he tells me he hasn't came in over month and that I look too good in my flannel skirt and white blouse and that I have to suck his dick now. He then pulls his pants down and I see his balls are really swollen and a purple-ish color and his dick is really hard and throbbing. I tell him I think it'd be wrong and with one hand he grabs me by the throat and throws me on the bed. He climbs on top of me between my legs and pulls my thong aside and tells me that this must be what I want and forces his throbbing cock into me, destroying my virginity. I cry from the pain because it's too big and he forces it all the way in and then he cries out that I'm too tight and I feel him cum inside me in one long squirt. It just keeps cumming and his balls deflate like balloons when the air is let out and there's so much it shoots out of me and covers the bed. He tells me this is my fault and never to tell anyone or I'll regret it and then he smacks me. When I wake up though I find my panties soaked and I'm incredibly turned on. What does this mean?