I can't maintain a relationship with a man, even one I really care about because I can't stop giving head to other men. I've tried and tried and for some frustrating reason I just can't. I was thirteen the first time I gave a guy a blow job. I snuck out of the house with a friend to meet three older boys who were 19 at the time. After we hung out for awhile, I made out with one and eventually his dick ended up in my mouth. He talked me through it and eventually he came with him telling me to swallow so I did. I've been sucking and swallowing ever since. It was years before I found out most girls don't like to suck never mind swallow cum.

Before that summer was over, I had blown that same guy again at least ten times plus his two friends and a few others more times than I can remember and I've never slowed down. The word got out around school making me a popular girl to hang out with and invite to parties. I just could never say no. If a guy shows me even a little attention and pulls his cock out, it'll be in my mouth before either he or I knows what's happening.

I am the same as I always have been to this day. When I was 17 a guy driving next to me sped up and slowed down next to me a bunch of times and pointed for me to pull over in a rest stop. Of course I did. He was a married guy in his thirties. I sucked him off right then and there and have blown him again at least a hundred times since.

My family took me on vacation to Spain right after I graduated from high school. I blew three dudes the first night, all way older than me and never stopped. The married Spanish guys loved me. I must have sucked off twenty different guys that week.

I went to college for a year and I was a friggin vacuum. I sucked off dozens of guys that one year. Since then I have met some men I really cared for but each relationship ended because I pushed the guys away because I wanted to suck strange cock. I've held (and lost) a lot of jobs because of this problem. I get a good job, do well, start flirting with the guys, one of them makes a move and his dick ends up in my mouth. Next thing you know guys are texting me and asking me to hang out and before I know it there isn't a guy in the place I haven't given a blow job too. Like an idiot, I use this to take advantage of my situation and end up being let go. Again and again it happens.

I moved in with my mom last summer while my boyfriend was out of town on a job for a few months. I made great friends with the girl who lived upstairs. Oh wait, did I tell you, I've been blowing her husband almost daily since the first week we moved in. Plus a couple of his damn friends.

I gave my boyfriend, who is so good to me and who I really love, grief about being away so we broke up. I went on a cock sucking rampage. I texted guys I had met in bars, former co-workers, husbands and boyfriends of friends, whatever. So many asked me to "hang out" and within minutes of getting there, they had their cocks out. Of course I would get offended, give them shit, they would give me shit and I'd end up sucking them off. Every last one. One night I visited an ex and when I arrived he and four friends were there. I felt uncomfortable when they started asking for head right off the bat. I called them assholes and jerks but like an idiot, once they pulled their hard cocks out I was on my damn knees blowing each and everyone of them. I just can't help myself!

Last month, an old co-worker asked to to hang out. He pulled his dick out in ten minutes. I was pissed and whacked him in tears but what was I doing five minutes later?? You guessed it. Blowing him. I met a girlfriend of mine afterwards at a bar and ended up blowing a stranger in the parking lot and I tried to get her husband and her friend's husband to let me blow them. I once counted how many men I blew in a month and it was over 35 men. I know I am disgusting but I can't help being this way.

I got back together with my boyfriend two weeks ago but dumped him last week. Why?? well, since I dumped him, I've already sucked off five different men in just the last few days. I've blown almost all of my younger brother's friends, pretty much every dude who lives in my neighborhood who is under 60 and most of my friend's husbands and boyfriends. I wish I could stop this self destructive behavior but I have no idea where to begin. WTF is wrong with me??