The guy who lives across the street from me is constantly taking care of his yard. Seems like every day he's got some machine turned on making more noise than a P-51's Merlin engine. He cuts his grass and then gets out his leaf blower to blow the grass off of his driveway. Gimme a break. You don't want grass on your car tires??!!!

If there's a machine out there with a motor attached to it he's got it, and you better believe he's gonna' use it. Every time you think that you might be able to enjoy a quite day sitting outside, asshole brings something out of the garage and turns it on. In the fall he's got his fucking leafblower going constantly. And where do you think his leafs blow?? That's right. Into my yard.

My wife thinks that he's just trying to get away from his wife. I think he's nuts. He'll cut his lawn long after the sun goes down just so he can drive around on his mower with the headlights on. I wouldn't doubt that he's sent pictures of his yard to Better Homes And Gardens, hoping that they'll come out to take a look at his yard.

I know some of you are probably saying that I should consider myself lucky that I've got such a conscientious neighbor instead of some redneck who lets his yard turn to crap. Well, I'll take that beer drinking, NASCAR loving slob any day.