Hi... I'm not really sure how to do this, so I guess I'll just go for it... I am a lesbian. It feels so weird to say... even though it's anonymous. I can't come out to my family, or my friends... soon, but not yet. I want to tell them so badly, but if I don't prepare them then it probably won't go well. The idea of being an out of the closet lesbian scares me a little. I think that I've known for a while, but just haven't acknowledged it. I keep watching the door, ready to close the internet window if someone comes home. It's a lot of work, to keep it a secret, especially when I met someone who I thought was the love of my life. Now it's over, and that really shook my confidence. I loved her so much, it hurts to think about it. We didn't brake up because she was cheating on me or anything, she was leaving, and I knew that I had to let her go, we both knew that it would never have worked. I know she still loves me, and every once and a while I check her Facebook account, and every time I do it's still there. She married me on Facebook. I know it sounds ridiculous, but she really wanted to, and I thought that it was cute. Every time I look on her profile, there it is. Sometimes I cry, sometimes I smile, and sometimes I do nothing. I don't know what to feel anymore. It's funny, she was the one person who I was always able to talk to, and now she's gone. We don't talk, and if we did, I think that it would hurt even more. I can't say any more, or I'll burst into tears. So goodbye I guess. The pain is almost gone, I hope...