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Straight Female / 36

I was raped by a very close friend when I was 17 and he was 18. It was date-rape, but still rape. Violent and forceful. I screamed and cried and begged him to stop, but I had two orgasms while he raped me.

I've done therapy and have a very normal life now and a very good sex life with my wonderful husband. I still feel ashamed about those orgasms.

4
# 20143 - by Anonymous / April 23, 2014
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Comments

Anonymous

by Anonymous on Apr 23, 2014 at 3:14 PM

retired police officer who handled several sex crimes. Never feel guilty about an orgasm in a rape situation. its a normal body function and beyond your control. If you tied a man down and raped or masturbated him, he would orgasm as well.
Did not mean you deserved it, did not mean you wanted it. just how nature works.

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Anonymous

by Anonymous on Apr 23, 2014 at 5:27 PM

I have felt that too and it has become better as I come to terms with what happened. One thing I tell myself which is helpful, the rapist doesn't deserve my energy and I make myself focus on that until the emotions subside. The more you do that, the easier it becomes and you are worth it.

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Anonymous

by Anonymous on Apr 25, 2014 at 1:30 AM

Orgasms are involuntary, please keep that in mind OP. it's not your fault, don't be ashamed. you did nothing wrong and it's common. I am sorry for the trauma they put you through but I am glad you've come out of it a strong person.

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Anonymous

by Anonymous on May 15, 2014 at 11:08 PM

As a counselor i have seen many women who were raped and i assure you it is very common and i even think perhaps normal. I'd say, from my practice, many women raped have organisms but are to ashamed to admit it. Women in our society are so slut shamed that they end up sexually repressed. When raped, it is beyond their control, and what happens is they let go because they can't control it and a wave of organisms come. I have had clients who masterbate and fantasize to their old rapes in order to relive the orgasmic event. I had one who repeatedly put herself in risky situations secretly hoping to experience it again. It sounds like you are doing better then many people i have seen. It is horrible this happened to you, but it you got a few organism out of it, that is nothing to fell guilty about.

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