I idolize a woman named Katie, who I worked with for about a year - almost 6 years ago. My wife knows about this, as does pretty much everyone I know. I think about her when I wake up, when I go to sleep and multiple times throughout the day. Katie stopped speaking to me back in 2009 and has made it clear that she wants nothing to do with me, she has never been attracted to me nor given me any reason to think she might be remotely interested in me. I don't contact her because it makes her feel uncomfortable. I often fantasize about meeting her in random places, what I'd say or do. She is the most attractive person I have ever seen, more beautiful than any celebrity or model. It has caused a lot of problems in my marriage. I have been to therapists, psychologists, counselors - written dozens of online posts about it. I feel like I'm obsessed with Katie. I find it hard to get aroused without thinking about Katie, and it's Katie's face that comes to my mind whenever I reach climax.

When I first saw Katie I had an immediate attraction to her. I was happily married and have never considered anyone else sexually besides my wife. It was as though Katie had stars in her eyes, her teeth glistened and shined when she smiled and her every movement replayed in my mind in slow motion. I recall having conversations with her where I'd just sit there and listen to her wonderful voice while I admired every square millimeter of her gorgeous face. I even remember the day she took off her shoes, her toes were so sexy I couldn't take my eyes off them. In my dreams I have pleasured Katie a million times or more - in every way imaginable.

I have considered seeing a hypnotist to see if he can help me forget Katie, though the thought of not having her in my mind is heartbreaking. You may not believe this, but I still love my wife very much and she has proven on countless occasions that she loves me too. She asked me what my ultimate fantasy would be and I told her watching Katie have an orgasm is the sexiest thing I could ever imagine. My wife simply said 'well, that's not something I'm able to help you with' which is true. I feel immensely guilty, and rightly so. It is what it is though - I adore Katie and have done since I first set eyes on her. The 'professionals' just tell me it will pass in time, well I haven't seen for five years now and it hasn't weakened at all. :(