When I was a kid I was in a cult. I grew up with no family, and I was trained to fight and kill People when I was 3. When I was 11yrs. I killed about 4 people already, The man that took care of us was in his late 60's and he had us Torture People and bring them back to where we stayed. In 1974 the People in the little town burned our home down, There were three of us and the old man, I was the youngest, But one of us died as well as the old man. I got out alive with second degree burns on my right hip and legs. I still have the scars of my past, my burns and satanic tattoos I had from the time I was am infant. I am now living in the United States ever since I was 12; a missionary group helped me to get here. I grew up in foster care when I came to the United states, No one new who I were and what happened to me.

I am dealing with this very recent because after all these years, I decided to take classes at a University and I read in a book about the incidents that dealt with my past in the late 60's and early 70's. I am now 39. I have two kids and I am haunted by my past. I am afraid to tell any of my friends, I am ashamed to get therapy. I don't want my kids to find out. I even fell ridiculous to writing this. What can I don't feel fit to live anymore.