It wasn't till much later that I was able to reconfigure this weird chain of events, but I did know and still know that it culminated in the most embarrassing night of my life.
I was at a Frat party during the last week of my first semester of college. I was tagging along with three friends, all girls, any one of whom I was hoping to hook up with. The party was a "New Year's Eve" party since none of us would be together for the actual New Year's Eve.
Every year some lucky pledge got to dress up as Father Time and then fling off his toga and beard to reveal a big diaper just like the baby that represents the New Year.
Well the guy they had chosen was a real jerk and as the night wore on he got drunker and drunker and more and more obnoxious.
Five sorority sisters he had been irritating hatched a plan to put him in his place.
Meanwhile, I too was drinking and not doing too good a job of getting any of my friends to think of me as more than a friend. They kept commenting on any remotely good-looking guy that walked by. At one point I decided, "screw you guys I'm going home" and was all set to walk back to my dorm...right after I took a leak. Someone was vomiting in the downstairs bathroom, so I went upstairs and found a nice clean bathroom.
As I left the bathroom, I noticed a commotion in one of the bedrooms. It seems that Father Time had passed out. These three frat guys asked me if I'd substitute for obnoxious boy. At first I said no, but then I thought, what the hell, maybe my friends would be impressed.
So back downstairs I went, only now I was wearing a fake beard, a toga and underneath it all, a diaper with 1998 emblazoned across it.
It was great; my friends were definitely impressed. Suddenly I was the life of the party, I could join any conversation I wanted. At some point I was talking to one or two of those sorority girls and their eyes got wide when they realized that Father Time was no longer that obnoxious guy. As I walked away from them, they started laughing and when I turned back and made eye contact with them, they laughed even harder. It made me feel a little uneasy, and I felt uneasier still as I watched them run over to another couple of girls and then point at me and laugh some more. Now, of course, I know that they were laughing because their practical joke was now going to be happening to innocent me, and for some reason, they were loving the randomness of my plight. And this is how it played out...
At midnight, I did as I was instructed. During the 10, 9, 8 countdown, I tossed off my beard and toga and good-naturedly accepted the applause and laughter that would greet anyone in a diaper. But as we got down to 3,2,1, two guys grabbed each of my arms and lifted them up, as if in triumph, while a third guy yanked off the diaper. The two guys holding my arms up wouldn't let go and I was forced to hang there naked, totally at their mercy. For a split second the room got quiet, and then it exploded into a laughter that was very different from the good-natured ribbing I was getting before. All I could do was stand (squirm) there and watch everyone laugh and point at me. The five sorority girls were doubled over with laughter and had tears in their eyes. Then I spied my friends, who at first were trying not to laugh, but eventually were laughing as hard as everyone else...
I was at a Frat party during the last week of my first semester of college. I was tagging along with three friends, all girls, any one of whom I was hoping to hook up with. The party was a "New Year's Eve" party since none of us would be together for the actual New Year's Eve.
Every year some lucky pledge got to dress up as Father Time and then fling off his toga and beard to reveal a big diaper just like the baby that represents the New Year.
Well the guy they had chosen was a real jerk and as the night wore on he got drunker and drunker and more and more obnoxious.
Five sorority sisters he had been irritating hatched a plan to put him in his place.
Meanwhile, I too was drinking and not doing too good a job of getting any of my friends to think of me as more than a friend. They kept commenting on any remotely good-looking guy that walked by. At one point I decided, "screw you guys I'm going home" and was all set to walk back to my dorm...right after I took a leak. Someone was vomiting in the downstairs bathroom, so I went upstairs and found a nice clean bathroom.
As I left the bathroom, I noticed a commotion in one of the bedrooms. It seems that Father Time had passed out. These three frat guys asked me if I'd substitute for obnoxious boy. At first I said no, but then I thought, what the hell, maybe my friends would be impressed.
So back downstairs I went, only now I was wearing a fake beard, a toga and underneath it all, a diaper with 1998 emblazoned across it.
It was great; my friends were definitely impressed. Suddenly I was the life of the party, I could join any conversation I wanted. At some point I was talking to one or two of those sorority girls and their eyes got wide when they realized that Father Time was no longer that obnoxious guy. As I walked away from them, they started laughing and when I turned back and made eye contact with them, they laughed even harder. It made me feel a little uneasy, and I felt uneasier still as I watched them run over to another couple of girls and then point at me and laugh some more. Now, of course, I know that they were laughing because their practical joke was now going to be happening to innocent me, and for some reason, they were loving the randomness of my plight. And this is how it played out...
At midnight, I did as I was instructed. During the 10, 9, 8 countdown, I tossed off my beard and toga and good-naturedly accepted the applause and laughter that would greet anyone in a diaper. But as we got down to 3,2,1, two guys grabbed each of my arms and lifted them up, as if in triumph, while a third guy yanked off the diaper. The two guys holding my arms up wouldn't let go and I was forced to hang there naked, totally at their mercy. For a split second the room got quiet, and then it exploded into a laughter that was very different from the good-natured ribbing I was getting before. All I could do was stand (squirm) there and watch everyone laugh and point at me. The five sorority girls were doubled over with laughter and had tears in their eyes. Then I spied my friends, who at first were trying not to laugh, but eventually were laughing as hard as everyone else...
