I know it's really fucked up, and I can't help it, but I want to and need to post this, and share it with someone. It's something that I've wanted to share for a long time. I guess, say what you will, but even at my age, I have a sex drive that won't stop. It's crazy, and it has been for years. I don't know what the problem is. I'm not kidding. My wife and I, on occasion, maybe once a month, twice a month at most, might fuck. It's not the greatest, but at least it helps me get off. And after that, seriously, I masturbate 8-10 times a week. It's using porn, videos I have saved, or whatever. I've done it for years, when I'm not fucking around. I know it sounds horrible, but it is what it is. She's just a prude, and not really into much, so through the years, I've figured out other ways to get it.

Back when I'd been married about 5 years, I had two kids at the time, she already had slowed down, and was bitching that she couldn't keep up with my drive, and she didn't know what the fuck was wrong with me. She said "once you get into your 30's, you're supposed to slow down. Not go crazier" and I just said I didn't know what the problem was. I couldn't help it. She didn't help matters much either.

About 5 years into our marriage was the first time "something" happened. It was with someone that I should not have done something with. I can't help knowing it was wrong, but at the time, it didn't stop me from doing it. And I was scared shitless, had regrets, worries, fears, and I guess I've gotten lucky it hasn't come back to bite me on the ass. Here it is.

I was walking past my step daughter's bedroom, and I almost swear to God had a stroke. She was standing there in her panties and bra. She was 14. And I looked, and saw a perfect set of small tits, cute little white panties, a little poofy stomach, and her thighs, creamy, and a bit bigger than "normal" girl size at that time. But I felt my dick get instantly hard, and I felt like a dirty fucking old man. I heard her say "is someone out there?" and I said "yeah, sorry, i was going to knock" and I heard her say "sorry, let me get some clothes on". When I walked in, she had on sweats and a tshirt. I couldn't stop looking. She'd taken off her bra, and I could see her little nipples. I felt so fucking perverted. And she says "what's the matter?" I just shrugged and said nothing. We were sitting there talking, and she asked me something that flipped me out. She says to me "I was curious about something. Not to creep you out or anything. But mom has some stuff in her room, and I wasn't sure if I could borrow it without her knowing?" I asked what it was. And she says to me "coochie cream" - I about shit. I looked at her, her face was all red, and I said "really? Why? You're like 14. Why do you need that?" and she says to me "I'm a virgin. Don't worry. But most of my friends, well they shave down there, and I guess it's normal. So I didn't want to seem like a freak. Figured I'd do it too, and that way they wouldn't say anything in the shower at school". I just looked at her, and said not to be a creeper, but I think girls with hair is sexy" and she says "really?" I said yeah. And she says "Ok. Well you've never seen mine, so you might not say" and kind of joking, I said "well, I dunno, guess you could show me" and she looked at me, shrugged and said "OK" and pulls down her sweats and her panties. I was staring at a dark black patch of pussy hair, and I felt my dick get hard. I kept saying to myself "Please. Don't get hard. Hold back" but I couldn't help it. She looked at me and says "well?" and I said "Honestly? God. That's fucking sexy. Sorry. I'm dirty and gross and nasty. But that's sexy" and she laughed and said "well OK then. Thanks" and I said sure, and got up to walk out.

She walked behind me, and wrapped her arms around me. I felt her boobs against my butt, and I felt her stomach against my back. And then I felt her arms around me, and she rubbed my cock. I jerked, and said "holy shit Jamie, what are you doing?" she just kind of laughed and said "kinda hard to hide when it's poking out of your pants and you were staring at me when I yanked my my sweats down" I just kind of nervously laughed and said "well yeah. True" and walked out.

Like two weeks later, she was in her room one night, I was at the house with her alone, and she was with the door part way open. I knocked, and she said "come in" and I walked in. I gasped. She was in her panties and no bra. About ready to put a t-shirt on. And I said "holy shit" and she laughed and said "what?" I just said "You can't do that" and she smiled and said "well, too late" and blew it off. I was fucking hard. I felt dirty, but I felt my dick spring up. And she pointed and said "boner?" and I couldn't hide it. She said to me "Ok, so this is going to probably gross you out. But I'm gonna ask a question" and I said sure. She says to me "when you and mom fuck, how long do you last?" I said "what the hell?" and she says to me "seriously? I'm curious" and I said "well depends on how long it's been since we've done it" and she says straight out "you masturbate? Get off when you do?" I just laughed and said "since you're being blunt? yeah. I do" and she says "how often?" I said "I dunno. 6 or 7 times a week". She about shit. She looked at me and said "holy shit. Seriously?" I shrugged and said "I can't help it. Sex drive and all. Your mom isn't into it. But I do what I need to do"

She stood there. And she didn't say anything for a second. And she says "I had sex two weeks ago" - I looked at her and said "Well uh, thanks for sharing that with me?" and she laughs and said to me "well, it was my first time" and I said OK? and she says "He sucked. I was told it wasn't going to be any good. And they were right" I said "who was it?" and she said "a friend" so I left it alone. I said "did you guys use protection?" and she says with a shrug "yeah, well, you know mom put me on the pill when I was like 12. But yeah. He used a rubber". I just said "well that's good". And I said "well, thanks for sharing that with me. I'm thinking yeah" and she kind of laughed.

And she says to me "you last longer than like 5 minutes?" I laughed and said "well, I'd like to hope so. I mean, if I've done stuff first, and then fuck around later, then yeah. Second time, I can go for an hour" and she says to me "No shit? An hour? Christ. That's like forever". I just laughed and said "well, I don't get that with your mom, so it's not like I get a chance". She didn't hesitate. She says "you'd get that chance with me. Would you?" I said "would I what?" and she said straight out, no hesitation "fuck me?" I said "Seriously? No. You're too young. I piss you off, you get mad, you want to get even with me, I'm screwed. No. I wouldn't do it". She walked up to me, and stood in front of me. And she said "I'm not that much of a bitch. I'm not doing that. I'm not that nasty. Seriously. You don't think I'd fuck over anyone like that?" I just shrugged and said "I dunno"

She backed off. And she pulled off her sweats and her t-shirt. Was standing there in her bra and underwear. And said "I'd do it. Seriously. I won't tell" I said "Holy jesus Jamie. God. I'd do it without hesitating, but I'd feel like a dirty fucking old man. You're in high school. I'm not. It'd be really fucked up" and she shrugged and said "I don't care. I wanna know. I was with one guy. It fucking sucked. I want to know if it's any better"

I feel like a dirty fucking pervert. But we ended up fucking. Seriously. And after all the years of marriage, it was the best sex I've had. She has a nice little round ass, a small set of tits, and a hairy pussy, with a patch across it. The first time we did it, we were kissing, awkward, and weird, and I was fingering her. I made her come. I got her off once with my fingers, and I told her I'd lick her if she wanted. She said the guy never did anything. Basically they made out, he fingered her, got a condom on, fucked her, and blew. Game over. I didn't do that.

I took a long time before I even got my dick inside her. I didn't have a condomm. She told me about being on the pill, so I took a huge ass risk. I look back now, scared as hell, but I was honest to God so turned on and so worked up, I couldn't stop myself. The first time, after we were fooling around, I was inside her for probably 10 minutes. Going in and out. And when I was going to cum, I pulled out, and I shot it on her stomach, her legs, and across the middle of her chest. It went everywhere. We kind of laid there. She told me that it felt really good, and she liked it.

We got dressed. About 2 hours later, she was in her room, and I came up frmo the living room. I was getting ready for bed. And she called me into her room. I went in. And she was sitting on her bed. She looked at me and said "so if we did it another time? You'd go even longer?" I said "God Jamie. This isn't right. It's just kind of messed up" and she shrugged and said "but I liked it. It felt really nice". I stood there and said "Yes. You're right"

She stood up and started kissing me. And said "would you? Please?" I fucked her again. On her bed. And this time, I took a huge ass risk. But when she rolled over on her side, I pulled her up on top of me, and showed her how to get on and ride me. When i was inside her, I came. I really blew it. I popped really heavy. It was so much it started dripping out of her.

I have fucked her off and on for the last 6 years. It's a really gross thing, I'm sure some of you thinking ,but I can't help it. Her mom is fucking lame. She's fun, because she tries different things. And because she's really young and cute. And I can't help it.

Even now, I'm going to fucking masturbate and go to bed..