This is a follow up to the confession I wrote over a month ago
h*****/w**.adultconfession s.**m/view/22759
About a really bad situation I am in with a woman I met on a domination dating website.
I can't believe it has only 5 1/2 weeks... it feels like a year.

First off, my parents wrote back... and they said that whatever sick situation I had gotten myself into was none of their concern. You have no idea how crushing that was to me.

For a little while I thought about joining the army. But I didn't know how, I have no way of contacting them... and I was honestly afraid of it. Like I said I look really feminine and I am afraid I could never make it, that I would be picked on really bad by the other guys, or worse. And I was just too afraid to talk to the police. What if they didn't do anything? And they talked to her? I would be totally screwed.

So, I am still here... honestly it is not as bad as it used to be. I guess I made the decision to try to fit in here as best as I can. At least for the time being, until I figure out what to do. At first it was really bad, it seemed like she would yell at me no matter what I did. But most of that has stopped. When I first got here I was doing really badly with my chorse, and I didn't realize it. I didn't really have to do many at home, and I wasn't used to it. I'm paying way more attention to detail now. I thought I was good at cooking, but I was making a lot of mistakes there too. I realized it irritates her when I look in her eyes, so I always keep my eyes down. I don't try argue or contradict her anymore, I always call her "ma'am", and pretty much only speak when I'm spoken to. This may sound really bad, but really it came really naturally to me. I would so much rather be quiet and obedient than make her mad at me.

Another thing I was doing wrong was in the sex, I wasn't being gentle enough, I was hurting her, and that was making her really aggressive. I actually feel kind of sorry for her, she has the most overactive sex drive ever, and when she is turned on her clit sticks way out and looks all red and angry, she says that it hurts and having a mouth on it soothes her. As long as I am gentle with her she is gentle with me, unless she is having one of her crazy over the top orgasms. And I think those hurt her too.

I don't make her tell me anymore, if I can tell she wants me to go down on her I just do it. But I also try to turn her on and make her want it, because when she has had lots of orgasms, especially the huge ones, she is *so* much nicer to me the next few days. She will hug me, run her fingers through my hair, say nice things about me, and this might sound so pathetic but I love that. When she is letting me sit on her lap and run her fingers through my hair, I feel incredibly safe, like nothing in the world could hurt me in that moment.

So, I am ok, at least I am surviving, it is really not so bad. I have pretty much no free time, but I got used to that pretty quickly, I am really into video games (especially WoW and Hearthstone, old snes rpgs, and some CoD), but I haven't thought about those games in a while, that seems like a past life almost. I guess at some point I started to really want her to like me, and I'm spending all my time and energy on that.