The other day I was cruising on some online sites looking for escorts. For some reason anonymous sex is so thrilling for me. I found a post on cl about someone else looking to meet up. The problem is I'm married. I swear I don't know what I'd do without my wife, but sex with her sometimes just isn't fulfilling for me so I find myself looking for other opportunities to fuck. I don't know why I'm so messed up and can't have a normal relationship. Anyway I started exchanging emails with this woman. It turns out she was BBW. Nothing against BBW but I'd never been with a woman like that before so I thought I'd try it. I'm pretty scrawny myself.

I started getting so hot thinking of her big body against me. When we met up I was somewhat disgusted at first, but then I decided I'd come this far I might as well go all the way. I took her to the bedroom where she gave the best deep throat bj of my life, god I was going to cum hard and quick I could tell. So we backed off a bit and I stuck by dick in between her tits. They were so soft and warm and huge. I found myself on the edge of orgasm again, which was weird because I didn't really feel all that attracted to her physically.

So it was time to drill her from behind and I did. She was amazingly tight, but afterwards I just felt disgusted with myself. Because there I was cheating on my wife who I care about with this BBW that I was definitely not attracted to. What would posses me to do such a thing. It seems to me that I get in this state of mind where I am blind to any of life's wisdom and I'm consumed by sex. Then I finish. I came. I showered. She hugged me goodbye. I didn't particularly feel guilty because there was no emotional connection whatsoever. But I feel like deep down I'm a shitty person. Why would I put the ones I truly care about through this because I have no sexual control?