I was 15 visiting my aunt, and we were at their house on the beach. I snuck out of the house because I was bored, to go sit on the sand and watch the ocean. I got bored and walked down the beach, I was about a mile away from my aunt's house and I saw a bunch of people. I walked towards them and it was a bunch of guys and they were fucking a girl. One of the guys noticed me and came to get me and I was fucked by four of them.

Years later, I was a freshman in college, and I went to dance. I met a guy there, he was a senior and he hit on me, and took me to a room and felt me up real seriously. He was real horny, he had his penis out and was trying to get my pants down. All I could remember was that night on the beach, I stopped resisting him and let him take my pants off and fuck me on the bed.

After that I became a pest and wanted to hang out with him all the time, no matter how much sex he wanted I would give it to him, whatever, wherever, however. Whatever he wanted to do I did.

I never got over him, I am still not over him. I got him to give a child when I was 23, I begged him for it, begged and begged and begged until he relented and told me I could go ahead and have a child.

He won't get married, he told me that I am too much for him, I know I am selfish and too demanding, I can't help it. I am not this way with anyone else, only him.

I never told him about that night at the beach. I don't see anyone else, I am totally loyal to him. I want to get married, and I want to have another child. I don't think it is right for us not to get married. I want to live with him permanently, not just most of the time. I don't tell him about the beach because I don't want him to feel sorry for me. I don't want anyone to feel sorry for me about what happened.