Right after I finished my bachelor's degree my family found itself in very difficult financial straights. In order to get a loan to save my family's business it was decided that I would marry a man from my parent's country and move back there to live. I really had no choice, my seven year old sister was sent with me for company, we were to be his third and fourth wives.

Having been raised in the west I thought everything would be ok, his first wife was over forty and his second wife was 26, not much older than me, and I knew what a wife's duties were, or so I thought. My little sister was still too young she would stay with the older children until she was old enough to be a wife. He was a doctor, an educated man, and everything we heard he was a good and understanding husband.

I arrived at my husband's home, and quickly had difficulties with his first wife. She did not like me, I was not from there. My little sister was sent to live with the older children, to be schooled and raised one day to become his wife when she got older. For me it was different, I had to become a wife immediately, and I did not know how.

I immediately became pregnant, and lived with my husband's second wife, who was also pregnant with her second child. She became my friend, my sister in every respect. She was a great help, having had a child a year earlier, she helped me a lot.

One day I didn't carry out my chores, I was six months and very tired, I found myself in front of my husband, explaining why I had failed in my duties. He was in a foul mood and let me know of his disappointment. Never in my life had I felt so humiliated, disappointing him made me feel very small. I was warned that next time, he could take a lash to me. I cried myself to sleep that night, no matter the comfort of my little sister. I had failed my husband, and I was embarrassed and afraid. For the first time since we came to my husband's home I felt alone.

It wasn't until after the birth of my son, that my husband spoke with me again.

And so I learned, and with my little sister with me, we were able to adapt to our new life. By the time my sister was fifteen it was obvious that she was very intelligent, and I asked my husband to please let her go to college, to become a doctor like him. She was very affectionate with him, and he agreed, she unlike any of the rest of us in the house, had the ability to make his head turn in her direction. Of all of us, she was a truly spoiled child. She did continue her studies and practiced with him until he retired.

Growing up in the west gave me a different view on life, but living with my husband gave me a meaning to my life. I would grow to be very close with him. He was a very kind and gentle husband. I miss him greatly.