I am now married, I have two kids, and a good husband. We've been together for almost 6 years, and have a pretty good life. We get along pretty well, both work, have a nice little house, and some days are better than others like most. The only problem is, the last 2 years or so, our sex life sucks. He's always tired, and when we do stuff actually at night, it's over pretty quick. I don't know what it is, that he can't seem to hold it in, and I don't really get what I want anymore.

When I was in high school, I did very little until I was a senior in high school. The first guy I slept with was a couple years older than me, and he was lousy. It really sucked. I'd heard that guys older knew their stuff, but really, we'd been hanging out, and one night, we got into it kind of heavy, and I figured what the hell. It lasted about 20 minutes. A lot of heavy making out, he knew I was a virgin, basically got into it, and no sooner than he got the condom on, and started fucking me, he popped. That was it. He said he'd do it again later that night, but it didn't. He wanted to the next morning, but I said NO. And we talked as friends for a bit, but it never went farther. About 2 months later I fucked another guy. It was a friend of mine's older brother, and he was just OK. He bragged that he'd make me feel amazing, and I'd love it. And when we were done, I pissed him off when I said that it wasn't as good as he promised. He just got mad and said whatever. It's not always as perfect as the girl wants it. I had to laugh at him, and that was the end of it. So I didn't have a lot of experience, but I knew that sex wasn't supposed to be lame all the time, and the guy gets what he wants.

Well, just before my graduation, one night, I was at the house alone. My little brother and sister had gone to my grand parents house up north. My step dad came home later that night from work, and we were in the house alone. A lot of stuff happened that night, and about 2 in the morning, we ended up having sex. The first time it happened, it was kind of awkward, it started out really slow, some kind of joking conversation, and I was really horny, so when I kind of propositioned him, he laughed and said that was funny. But when he realized I was serious, he told me no initially, and said it wasn't a good idea. Step relatives or not, not being a blood father or whatever, he said it wasn't a good idea to cross that line. It took a bit of talking to him, and I convinced him that I wasn't going to gets stupid or crazy but I was just horny, and I'd been curious about having sex with him. I think that because of his situation with my mom, and the fact they didn't do a lot together, that's kind of what made it happen.

The first time wasn't bad. It lasted kind of a long time. But like an hour later, I was downstairs in the living room, he was in his bedroom, and he'd come downstairs. I was getting ready to head to bed, and when I was walking out, I felt him come up behind me. He'd put his arms around me, and he started kissing on me and touching me and doing things. And told me that the sex we'd had was the best he'd had in ten years. And he said it made him feel young again and amazing. And he told me he hadn't had sex twice in a single day in years. But asked me if I would. I said yes. I wanted to be with him again. I didn't have a lot of experience, but the way he was, it just felt good. Really amazing. And the second time, he did things to me that a guy had never done. He made me orgasm like 6 or 7 times. And when he was inside me, and he came, It was the most intense thing I'd ever felt in my life, watching his face as he let go. I'd never let a guy do that. I'd always used protection until him.

We ended up having sex about a dozen times more between the time I graduated and the time I left for college. When I'd come home on weekends, or spring break or vacations, we'd end up doing it more. In the 4 years of college, and during the time of high school, I've probably had sex with him a hundred times. I know I should feel guilty or dirty, but I can't. My mom is a bitch, and treats him like shit, and I know she doesn't put out. One time when I was at college, I'd come home for the first time in about a month. We end up having sex that first night she's at work, and I don't think it took him 5 minutes to orgasm. He apologized, and said honestly he gets off on occasion, but no, nothing rarely happens. We did it a second and even third time that night, and I remember him laughing when we were done, and he said he'd never had sex with a girl enough to make his dick hurt. The funny thing is? When I went back to school, I hurt down there for a couple of days. My roommate joked that I needed to stop getting the D on vacation. And if she only knew.

Well, after college, I"d met my husband. We got along well, things worked out, and a couple years later, we got married. I knew my step dad was disappointed that our stuff would stop, but he told me he understood. I was shocked, when the day before our wedding, he asked me if he could sleep with me one last time. I know it was wrong, but I wanted to. I was really horny, and my soon to be husband was busy with work. We had sex three times the night before I got married. And honestly, it was the best intense sex I'd ever had. Even comparing him to my soon to be husband, who I'd slept with the entire time we'd been living together, he couldn't compare. I think it was just there.

Since I've been married, my sex life just isn't what I want it to be. So I will sound like a whore or trashy when I say that, in the last 4 months, I've since had sex with my step dad probably a dozen times. I won't deny that it's wrong, and I know that, but I will say honestly that he physically makes me feel like I have never felt with my husband. And he's told me that my mom has never done for him what I have. I know that should be really messed up. But in a way, i wonder if maybe he should have left her, and we should have been together...