Have you ever realized later that you made the mistake of a life time?

I moved in with a great guy 5 years older then me. he was a police officer and made my panties wet just looking at him. He was the big guy many woman in town lusted over. I found that the height large feet and hands, also means a large and long penis. It was horrible trying to take him especially as much as he liked it. We were in bed all day some times. I felt like he had ran a log in me and turned it around. It hurt like hell for years and I faked it.
He had ended his last relationship with a girl he loved, because she would not have sex with him as much as he liked. I was not loosing him for that reason. I could take the pain and over time it would get easier.

Well it did get better but for five years the only orgasm I had was when he gave me oral sex or I masturbated in the tub. I used lubes and tried to give as much oral sex as I could. Then he ask why when a request for sex was given I blew him instead. He loved me and he treated me so well. Except the marathon sex he just had to have. Near the end of things he reserved a ocean front room in Va Beach for us. A weekend anniversary gift for me, with shopping in the day, and his gift was thrusting me nearly all night in and out of the hot tub. Being rammed in the water after my lube is gone now that was horrible. And on the way home I made my mind up I would end things some how.

I did not have the nerve to tell him that I had lived a lie sexually. All those time I faked orgasm were actually cries out of pain. So I set it up to look as if I were cheating on him. When he ask I did not tell the truth, I told him I had lost my feelings for him. I wanted out. he was a bit upset but he told me I was free to leave. He would get on with his life. I knew he would be ok. Woman made passes at him all the time. I was right, it only took a few months after that and he was dating a girl a few younger then me. She was what I had always pictured him with. She had big tits and the curvy build.

I crept up to the living room window one night when I saw him walk by. I could see them in there having sex. In the kitchen chair with her in his lap facing him. A position I had been in with him many times. Except she was not hurting, was was loving it. She was riding him with passion and pleasure. I ran away and cried my eyes out. That bitch was pleasing the man I loved and could not take.

She must have been perfect for him. They move in together, sold our house and paid me off. Then moved 35 miles away to where she lived. I got a job there the next year. partly for the benefits, partly to ride by and see him now and then. I would see his sister in law a few times a year for lunch, she kept me filled in. She showed me pictures of him and her, then the children she gave him. He looked so happy it tore me apart.

Twenty two years later his sister in law told me he was going to Philadelphia for a convention. She told me the hotel and the dates. So I took my vacation time and I arranged a room close by his. The look on his face was priceless when he saw me in the elevator. I told him I was there for my law office. He was there for a security Co he owns and runs. So we had dinner together. After he came to my suite and we talked about old times. I had to know was he happy.

He was happy but had bad news about his wife. She had cancer and they had removed all of her vagina to save her life. I told him it was probably the cock he had that wrecked her. He did not think that was funny. I felt like an ass. I ask him what he did for sex now? I knew he had a sex hunger that was beyond human. He told me they had their ways. Her friend was single and she had ask me to marry if she did not make it, well she comes over a few times per month and joins them. He said he loved her and would be by her side until the day either she or he died.

I ask him if he would like to stay in my room for old time sake? I would love to feel him cuddled to me while i slept one more time. If he wanted a bit more than that, I would enjoy that as well. He told me he worried someone might see us and word get back to his wife. he would NOT want her upset or embarrassed.He had a lot to loose and worried it might be to much of a risk.

I told him I would not say a word to anyone. That I would check for him to leave my room and not be seen. He said he would sleep in my room and would think about the other. The thinking did not last long after I came to bed nude as i have always slept. My clothes stacked beside the bed in case I have to run out for some reason. I could feel his penis hitting the butt cheek of mine, I reached back and got it in my hand. I told him it was not as big as I remembered. He told me age takes care of that. When his wife got sick he did not have any kind of sex for two years.

We had sex and for the first time with him I did not feel like he was ripping me open. The sex was the best of my life. I had real orgasms and they were intense. I had three wonderful nights with him. On the last night he had recovered a bit more of his hardness and i could feel him stretching me. It still was a wonderful feeling and the last day I cried my eyes out. I left him a note at the desk, took an earlier flight back home. I told him that I would be there for him and I loved him more today than I did at any time.

He has not called or contacted me via email. I stole two of his dirty tee shirts. I keep them in a plastic bag, I smell them and think of him. His smell was like a cologne in the air. I have the memories now, but I wish I had given him children and most of all hung in there with him.