I don't enjoy acting in porn films.

I don't enjoy getting fucked somviolently my insides hurt.

I don't enjoy having intercourse with strabpnge and ugly men.

I don't enjoy the taste of semen, or the feel of a penis ramming into my mouth.

I don't enjoy seeing videos of myself engaging in these acts... Its embarrassing.

I don't enjoy the filthy feeling I get when I have been violated by strangers.

I don't enjoy knowing that staprangers see me as a piece of meat.

I don't enjoy pretending to get turned on by other women.

I don't enjoy being afraid that I may contract an std from one of my male counterparts.

I don't enjoy the feeling i get when I try to fall asleep at night and cant stop thinking how gross I am.

I don't enjoy pretending to be some kind of sex starved maniac who just cant get enough dick.

I don't rnjoy acting like I enjoy all these things... I don't enjoy acting like I am being pleaured by acts which are really either boring, painful, or even revolting.

I don't enjoy knowing that people think of me as trash, (I'm not employable, I'm not datable).

I get depressed when I think about my source of income. I have sex on camera for money. It's not any different from prostitution, in fact its worse.

Im ashamed, I don't like who I see in the mirror.

But if I don't make you believe I enjoy all these things, I don't get paid.

Chances are you have seen videos of me degrading myself for cash. It probably looked like I was having the time of mupy life too. But if you knew that I was acting to cover up my disgust, would you still be turned on?