I want to say this and get it out of my head. I hope someone else reads this and it may help them with lifes decisions.

Was a strong A type person with a bright future. I had what i wanted picked out in life, and planned to get it started early. I picked the BEAUTIFUL girl of my dreams (turned out to be a night mare). I courted her and found she was a virgin, had plans to be a virgin when she got married. She wanted me to know that and think it over before we dated further.

I thought about it and made my mind up that I could wait. I had sex with a LOT of girls and women by now (remember i said I started early). I told her, There are some things in life worth waiting for, and I think you might be that person. If you are willing to accept me, I can accept your choice. We dated for nearly 3 years. I got to do a few things with her, but she would only masturbate me. No oral sex and did not like or want oral preformed on her. She had a beautiful face and the body that was amazing. her breast were just mind blowing perfect. I say she could have posed as a centerfold and I say she could have done that with out the need for touch ups. Her skin was flawless.
Marriage was the nightmare part, when sex was nearly impossible. It did not fit and I hurt her so bad when we had sex. She would cry and I would feel horrible. I tried for over 2 years when I had enough. I could do no more. I ask for a divorce and moved on.

Got an apartment in the city fifty miles away where I worked. I had talked with a girl there a few times, and once i had ended things I invited her to the apartment for dinner. Not a chef I made something small but nice. She did not drink and was to young to drink. I was just 22 and she told me she was 18. She was still in high school, was held back a year and started school late. I accepted her story, why would she lie? (She lied and her mom and sister backed up her lie).
I got off work at 8 am and when I got home, she was parked in front of my apartment. She got out with a bag of food, told me she was fixing me breakfast. She had my favorites, she could cook very well.
After breakfast she ask if she could get in bed with me, I agreed rather quickly. A long leg young girl with a pretty face and a nice body. Small breast but puffy nipples made my meat fat just looking at her naked.
I stripped to my shorts, got in bed, she stripped totally naked and got in. I had an idea I was getting lucky that morning. (keep in mind I had just got out of a relationship where my wife cried when we had sex, that was about 6 times in 2 years) I had a 18 (so I thought) year old girl in my bed nude and now she is taking off my undershorts.
My cock in her hand and my hands all over her body. MY GOD was she tight and worries of me hurting her came to mind. I still remember when my cock slid into her very wet very tight body, just how good it was, she kissed me and pushed her body upward and not a whimper. We were fucking and not a pain, but again was she tight. I tried to get her legs up, but she told me that was as deep as she could stand. I was happy enough with that much.

We spent the day in bed, and around 330 she told me she needed to leave for a while, she would be back. She had ot pick her younger sister up from school, take her home and then she would return. I showered after she left, went back to bed and just thought back on what I had just experienced. Nearly 6 hours of sex stopping for a bit here and there. but we had fucked all day long. Then I drifted off to sleep, to be awaken by her coming back. She had taken her sister home, had picked up dinner for she and I. Had showered at my house and got back in the bed. We went for another three hours before she told me she was so sore. Could we stop for food.
We ate dinner in the bed and talked. She ask if she could keep the extra key to my door. I agreed and figued if it got to bad i could change the locks.

That relationship lasted for 6 years. In that time we went from dating to married. She told me two years later, that she was 16 when she and I met, not 18. That her mom lied for her, she thought i was a great guy for her daughter, wanted me not to be scared off by her age.

Then all hell broke loose. When I was ready to settle down, she had hit age 21 when she could go out and drink, party and enjoy her youth. She no longer wanted to settle as a house wife, and to be a mom. She wanted no part of that. She wanted to party. Then new friends came around. A few i knew as sluts the guys at work used as side meat.
Then I told her what i wanted was not in line with what she wanted. It was time we ended it all. I had a feeling she was seeing someone, and she thought i was interested in a woman who worked with me. I was not, I was happy and in love with her. She thought if we split, i would find happiness with this woman my own age, who she thought liked me. Would have the kids I wanted and life would be good.

I found out a year later she really wanted to burn off some steam but really loved me. By then I was out of her life. Out of her area and moving on. That was after I had come close to suicide a few times.
Enough that I know what the barrel of my pistol tasted like.

I found someone else, and we have the kids and the loving home. I would not trade the wife I have for both of my ex'es if i could keep them both at the same time. I am truly happy. But i have wondered many times what it would be like, had I tried to work things out with my ex. I loved her then, and I love her today, just not in the way of a wife, but someone i once cared for. I was sad it did not work out, horribly sad.

If you have a marriage, try like hell to work things out. Its rough to get old and wonder what if,