In my youth I sucked my neighbor and the guy at the 7-11. The guy at the 7-11 let me see his underground gay magazines. He fucked me.

When I left for college I messed around with a couple of guys from college but it wasn't the same. I met and got together with the custodian that took care of the library. I sucked him off in the basement and he fucked me in the basement. I guess he was probably fifty. I spent a lot of time at the library. He liked me enough because he always let me suck him, even if there wasn't enough time to get fucked. I liked getting fucked, I really liked it.

After college things got more difficult and it took some time for me to meet my next long term lover. He worked on crew boats in the Gulf and he was used to giving it hard. The more he gave out the more I liked it. He dropped me for another guy and it took me a long time to get over him.

I met this guy who managed a flooring store. He was in his late fifties, with a white beard and he was really a polar bear. He had a group of friends and I hung out with them for parties and eventually moved in with him. I got into living with him and he gave me a free hand on how I wanted to fix up the place. Pretty soon we were an old married couple. At one of the parties a new guy came, about 45 and he fucked me in the bathroom. When my partner found out I had let him fuck me he threw me out on the street.

I am 55 and I get sex with men I don't even know. I like real tops, especially bear tops. When I meet guys they expect me to be the top, I just have that profile. I long for my youth, when there was no question who was who.