Straight Male / 33
I look at porn – who doesn't right? So I went through a phase several years ago and started looking at nothing but blowjob porn. I found this one pic that really did it for me, and I couldn't figure out what it was about the pic. The girl was Latina (I like Latinas) but not particularly attractive. Finally I realized that the guy's cock was absolutely perfect and that was what was making me so hot. So I did the sensible thing and deleted the picture off my hard drive and stuck to lezzie porn.
A few months later, I had forgotten all about it, and I was in a new phase – cum on tits porn. I really liked the way the white cum spiced up a dark-skinned Latina's skin. So I was going through these pics and beating off when I ran across one that had cum on a girl's lips, chin, and tits, and it was captioned "I'm not gay, but I would totally make out with this girl right now." This sentence struck a chord with me, and I came all over myself when I read it. It was hot, but I felt ashamed so I didn't download that pic.
However, when I looked at cum on tits porn, I was thinking about how good it would be to clean these girls up with my tongue! It made me hot, and this time I didn't switch porn types. I just felt guilty as I fantasized about guzzling jizz while I beat off.
Finally, I decided that I needed a load in my mouth, and I went on craigslist. It was like a bucket of cold water. All the guys were... well, guys! Yuck! Sure, I wanted a mouth full of spunk, but I just couldn't go for any of the guys. After about a week, I gave up and switched porn types again.
About a year after that, I found xvideos. After that, I stopped looking at pics and started watching porn vids. Then I found a sub-genre called "trainer" videos. In these videos, you are supposedly hypnotized into being a cocksucker, eating cum, and enjoying it. I know it's all BS, but I love these videos. It's all girls on their knees sucking dick and getting creamed. I've started downloading the videos and saving them on my HD. I know I should delete them, but I can't. They're just too fucking good.
So one of them tells you to get on your knees and worship the cock. Something about that phrase makes me so horny – that's exactly what I want to do. I want to worship a cock, milk the cum out of it, and swallow every drop. It's not enough to get a mouth full of cum... I need to deserve that cum. I need to earn it – to coax every last delicious drop out of a cock, and I need to do it on my knees. What the fuck is wrong with me? I'm screwed up in the head, but all I can think about is adoring a beautiful dick on my hands and knees, and serving it with my mouth until I get my reward of a huge load in my mouth.
Why do I have this obsession? If I'm gay, why can't I just find a guy that I'm into and spend my life on my knees? Why are men so ugly whereas cocks are so amazingly beautiful?! Sometimes I think I need a shemale or something. I don't know what to do, but my girlfriend senses that something is wrong. She asks why we aren't having as much sex as before, but I don't know what to tell her.
A few months later, I had forgotten all about it, and I was in a new phase – cum on tits porn. I really liked the way the white cum spiced up a dark-skinned Latina's skin. So I was going through these pics and beating off when I ran across one that had cum on a girl's lips, chin, and tits, and it was captioned "I'm not gay, but I would totally make out with this girl right now." This sentence struck a chord with me, and I came all over myself when I read it. It was hot, but I felt ashamed so I didn't download that pic.
However, when I looked at cum on tits porn, I was thinking about how good it would be to clean these girls up with my tongue! It made me hot, and this time I didn't switch porn types. I just felt guilty as I fantasized about guzzling jizz while I beat off.
Finally, I decided that I needed a load in my mouth, and I went on craigslist. It was like a bucket of cold water. All the guys were... well, guys! Yuck! Sure, I wanted a mouth full of spunk, but I just couldn't go for any of the guys. After about a week, I gave up and switched porn types again.
About a year after that, I found xvideos. After that, I stopped looking at pics and started watching porn vids. Then I found a sub-genre called "trainer" videos. In these videos, you are supposedly hypnotized into being a cocksucker, eating cum, and enjoying it. I know it's all BS, but I love these videos. It's all girls on their knees sucking dick and getting creamed. I've started downloading the videos and saving them on my HD. I know I should delete them, but I can't. They're just too fucking good.
So one of them tells you to get on your knees and worship the cock. Something about that phrase makes me so horny – that's exactly what I want to do. I want to worship a cock, milk the cum out of it, and swallow every drop. It's not enough to get a mouth full of cum... I need to deserve that cum. I need to earn it – to coax every last delicious drop out of a cock, and I need to do it on my knees. What the fuck is wrong with me? I'm screwed up in the head, but all I can think about is adoring a beautiful dick on my hands and knees, and serving it with my mouth until I get my reward of a huge load in my mouth.
Why do I have this obsession? If I'm gay, why can't I just find a guy that I'm into and spend my life on my knees? Why are men so ugly whereas cocks are so amazingly beautiful?! Sometimes I think I need a shemale or something. I don't know what to do, but my girlfriend senses that something is wrong. She asks why we aren't having as much sex as before, but I don't know what to tell her.
