When I was a kid back in the 70's and early 80's my life was a one huge pile of shit just a huge hell hole. My fucking old man was the biggest ass hole you could meet the stereotypical white trash. Beat the shit out of me and my Mom drank like a fish and spent money like it was water. He had a good job and made good money just never had any. He was a big man not in fat just big burly stood 6 foot tall and had big working mans hands. If not for my Mom I would have ran off years ago. I was the product of my Dad knocking up the Prom Queen my Mom said he was a bad boy that's whet attracted her to him. All I saw was a huge dumb ass piece of shit. We lived in a run down single wide trailer with thin walls roasted our asses off in the summer and froze them off in the winter. The walls were so thin I could hear them fight and fuck in their room. He must have road my Mom hard because when they went at it the whole fucking place would shake.

Just when I thought things could not get worse they did he put my Mom in the hospital after beating her up one night and that left me alone with him. I was not very big I had been sick after being born and had a hard time gaining weight so I was skinny and had not hit my growth spurt at age 14 when all this happened so I was still afraid of the bastard. The night after he beat Mom he did not come home until the next day. He brought some skank home and proceeded to fuck the shit out of her in my Moms bed. I heard he yelling fuck me fuck me. I put a pillow over my head but could still hear them. i heard her say no and he slapped her then heard him say I am going to rip into your ass. I heard her scream as i guess he slammed his cock up her ass. She kept screaming stop but he kept plowing her. I heard him yell Oh my fucking GOD and a few more squeaks of the bed springs and then silence except her crying I heard him tell her to get the fuck out. I had no door on my room and saw her rush by nude with her cloths in her arms.

I went to see Mom after school but i dint tell her what happened. She asked about my old man and I told her he was fine saw no reason to worry her when she was healing. He messed her up pretty bad her face was all purple her eye looked like she had stitches. They told the hospital she had a car wreck but they had seen her enough times they knew what happened. I walked home and fixed the old man something to eat and left it in the oven to keep it warm. I did not see him for 3 days and it was actually nice at home. On the forth day it was late I was up watching a Horror movie when he cam busting in the door drunk off his ass he fell into the living room. He lay there for a bit moaning and slurring his speech. I got up to go to my room and he grabbed my leg WHERE YOU GOING he yelled. I just stopped and stood there no point fighting with him if I did he would come after me down the hall and beat me. HELP ME TO THE FUCKING SHOWER. With his size and mine all I could do was be there to steady him. Got him to the bathroom and he slumped on the toilet. i turned on the water checked it and stood there while he used me as a steady hold and took off his clothes. I had seen him in his underwear he often walked around that way and knew he was big down there but had never seen it. He almost slipped in the shower and reach for me almost pulling me in. I came face to dick so to speak and he was huge. he sat on the bathtub floor and let the water run over him. I shut the curtain and went to my room. I fell asleep then I heard him yell WHO FUCKING USED ALL TH FUCKING HOT WATER!!! I heard him getting out of the tub and lumber down the hall to my room. He stood naked in the door taking up the whole space yelling about the hot water. I was still half asleep when i felt him grab my arm and pull me out of bed and drag me down the hall pushing me into the cold shower I only had my underwear on and it was cold. HOW THE FUCK DO YOU LIKE IT FUCK STICK he yelled. I stood in the cold shower as he yelled at me. I wanted to say he used the hot water but did not dare.

I just stood there and looked at him he got a look in his eye and I could see his dick was hard. He had a mean evil look like I had never seen even when he beat me. he jerked me out of the shower and dragged me down to his room. He threw me across the room and I hit my head against the wall. He pinned me on the bed and ripped my underwear off. I could smell the beer and cigarettes on his breath as he said close to my face in a breathy voice. You are going to do what your Mom can not since she is not here because of you. He clamped his big hand over my mouth and spit on his hand and smeared it on his dick. I was afraid as he propped my legs up i could feel his spit wet cock against my butt hole. He jammed it in but I was dry and tight. He held me down with his big meaty arm and got Vaseline from the side of the bed and wiped it on my ass. He then put his cock back at my ass hole held me down and shoved it all in. I have read stories about how good it felt etc I say thats bull shit it hurt so bad I thought he was ripping my insides out. He went to town pounding at my ass and holding me down. I started to cry from the pain and he slapped me and told me to fucking grow up. I am not sure if I passed out from the pain but i sort of went limp for a bit. He pounded on me for a while making the trailer shake. His beer breath blowing in my face. He tensed up and yelled out FUCK THAT FEELS GOOD THE TIGHTEST I HAVE EVER HAD he pumped real hard gritted his teeth and grunted a few time breathing heavy. Then I could feel him dump in me and feel it ooze out my ass. When he was done he he pulled out and it felt like he took my insides out with his cock he spit in my face and told me to take my cock loving ass back to my room. i got up and walked to me room. I noticed it was not cum from me it was blood it wa running down my legs. I took a T shirt and cleaned it off and put a pair of jeans on my bed to soak up any that was still there or leaked out. i lay in my bed and cried my self to sleep.

The next day I woke up late he had gone to work I walked to school in pain and skipped Gym class. I went to the bathroom because it felt like I had to shit or like he was still in inside me. When I walked home i hoped he was not there but he was laying on the couch in his underwear. I tried to enter without him hearing me but the fucking trailer door always stuck and it made a loud bang and he woke up. He looked up at me and said how you feeling today? in a smart ass way. I had hoped he was so drunk he would not remember. He grabbed me spun me around and pulled my pants down he looked at my ass and said damn I tore that thing up last night we better take a break for a few days. When he spun me around I thought for sure he was going to do it again. Standing there with my pants down he spun me around again and said I am still not sure you are mine with that little pecker you have. Make me something to eat. I put my books down and went in the kitchen the whole time he watched me laying there and playing with him self under his underwear. We ate and i started to clean up. He said leave it and get in the room. I walked down the hall and started to walk in my room he yelled NO MY ROOM! I was frightened again had he changed his mind? I walked in and stood there he came down the hall and removed his underwear and flopped on the bed making his big cock bounce as he hit the bed. Come over here he said almost nicely. I walked over and he reached up holding my face in his hand smashing my mouth around and said hmmm I dont know it just might fit. He then grabbed the back of my head and pushed me down to his dick. I was not sure what to do I had played with a kid in the trailer park a bit but never really sucked anyone. He grabbed his dick and held it straight up And pushed me down to it with the other. He said in a breathy voice suck it. I opened my mouth and took it in. I was doing my best and he kept a strong hold on the back of my head. Soon he was slipping in and out of my mouth and kept pushing to go deeper. I heard him say if you throw up on my cock I will beat the shit out of you. I kept my mind on not gagging and not throwing up and did not notice just how far he had it in. I could feel it gagging me but I just kept telling myself not to throw up. He grunted and filled my mouth with cum and pushed me down on it so I could not breath and could do nothing but swallow it. He held me there until I felt like i would pass out.

He pulled me off and told me to get the fuck out the sight of me made him sick as I walked out he yelled I HAVe A FAG FOR A SON A COCKING SUCKING FAG!and threw something at me. I ducked and went to my room I did not sleep that night I lay there thinking up ways of killing him. I ran away that next day and swore I would never go back. The cops picked me up and drove me back and there he was in the doorway waiting for me. After they left he beat me up again and told me to never try that shit again. The whole time Mom was in the hospital I ended up being her stand in for cooking cleaning and what ever else he wanted.

Mom came home and things went back to normal or as normal as our fucked up family could be. He always looked at me and made kissing noises in my direction. He would throw his underwear at me or shake his crotch at me. Always calling me a fag I never knew when he would try something again so I walked lightly around him. My Mom seemed very sad and never really got better after the last beating. He had crushed the last bit of life out of her. he got me a few more times and the last time hurt me bad it was painful to shit for weeks. When I turned 16 I dropped out of school and left home I begged my Mom to come but she would not leave him. I left and never looked back I loved Mom but could not save her she was gone.

Look I have no problem with men who like other men and I support Gay rights but in no way should that decision be taken away from a person. It took me years to get over what he did and the hate I had for him. I came to the point I had to forgive him for my own sanity he was sick and was a damaged person but I do not need to own his fucked up mental problems. I am still broken at age 50 but I get better every day.