You need help my friend. I am a therapist and have had a few male patients tell me in private how much they are sexually attracted to their mothers. Everyone of them had a mom who looked more like their sister. One former patient confessed to ejaculating on his mother while she slept as she was a sound sleeper who mixed alcohol with anxiety medicine. He even claimed to have rubbed his penis across her lips and placing the head in in her mouth. His ultimate fantasy was having two of his friends, who he says were equally attracted to her, hold her down while taking turns having sex with her. When he acted on it she had him and his friends arrested and they were eventually sentenced to prison time.
This is a porn-driven obsession. Quit the porn addiction!