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Women Only
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Straight Female / 40
This is the beginning of year 15.
When I was growing up I could never get interested in a boyfriend. I just couldn't. All my friends and the people I talked with were older. I never got along with people my age. I never even wanted a relationship.
When I was 23 at my job after college I more or less dated this guy, but I could never come to the point of wanting or having a sexual relationship with him. He finally dropped me and went away. When I was 25, that is 15 years ago, I changed jobs and I met this man at work. His college diploma showed that he graduated the year I was born. Two days later he had me in his arms and I just looked around the room while he had sex with me, almost as if I was not there.
From that first day I set up house for him. We never spoke about it, it just happened. Somehow I knew what to do and how to be his. I got pregnant and went on to have three kids. You would think that I would have at least talked about having kids but we didn't. I just went ahead and had kids, like some people drink water. One two and three and it was time to stop, three was enough, a boy and two girls.
Every day now I go about my life, raise my kids, keep house, work at my job. When he talks to me I listen, I feel it is very impolite to interrupt him or not listen. I don't know why, but we have never had two pillows. If I want a pillow I share. We have bought two pillows, but one always ends up on the floor, so I gave it to my older daughter.
I am 40 now and people tell me I look great. I feel great, I think that is what they are talking about, because if I compare my pictures of when I was 25 and now I certainly don't look the same. Every day is great as far as I am concerned. To me he looks great. I don't know if we ever had an argument of any kind. He is not an arguer and neither am I. An old woman, who really knows how old she was, when we were on vacation in New Mexico told me that I am the hand and he is the glove.
Some people tell me that I should have looked for a younger man, because he may not be around when my kids get married, but that is nonsense, as if I looked for the man. I did not look, he found me and took me home with him. I was more of a lost dog than anything else when I was 25.
Not much of a confession or anything like that, just a few minutes to jot down some words.
Happy Holidays,
When I was growing up I could never get interested in a boyfriend. I just couldn't. All my friends and the people I talked with were older. I never got along with people my age. I never even wanted a relationship.
When I was 23 at my job after college I more or less dated this guy, but I could never come to the point of wanting or having a sexual relationship with him. He finally dropped me and went away. When I was 25, that is 15 years ago, I changed jobs and I met this man at work. His college diploma showed that he graduated the year I was born. Two days later he had me in his arms and I just looked around the room while he had sex with me, almost as if I was not there.
From that first day I set up house for him. We never spoke about it, it just happened. Somehow I knew what to do and how to be his. I got pregnant and went on to have three kids. You would think that I would have at least talked about having kids but we didn't. I just went ahead and had kids, like some people drink water. One two and three and it was time to stop, three was enough, a boy and two girls.
Every day now I go about my life, raise my kids, keep house, work at my job. When he talks to me I listen, I feel it is very impolite to interrupt him or not listen. I don't know why, but we have never had two pillows. If I want a pillow I share. We have bought two pillows, but one always ends up on the floor, so I gave it to my older daughter.
I am 40 now and people tell me I look great. I feel great, I think that is what they are talking about, because if I compare my pictures of when I was 25 and now I certainly don't look the same. Every day is great as far as I am concerned. To me he looks great. I don't know if we ever had an argument of any kind. He is not an arguer and neither am I. An old woman, who really knows how old she was, when we were on vacation in New Mexico told me that I am the hand and he is the glove.
Some people tell me that I should have looked for a younger man, because he may not be around when my kids get married, but that is nonsense, as if I looked for the man. I did not look, he found me and took me home with him. I was more of a lost dog than anything else when I was 25.
Not much of a confession or anything like that, just a few minutes to jot down some words.
Happy Holidays,
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