I'll keep it short - went to a family funeral and saw some relatives for the first time in many years. I ended up in a family room at the funeral home with my 18 year old niece (18 by 2 weeks). When my brother (her Dad) and my sister-in-law walked in, the niece was on her knees with a mouthful of me (she was a very willing participant). My brother wants me arrested - or killed, my wife wants a divorce, my own daughter called me a "sick perv" and my mother says she doesn't think she can go on living. The niece? She just sent a picture to my cell phone of her naked playing with herself. I might as well go try and nail her - can't get any worse, tight?