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- My Family -

Though I really did not mean it. I heart my sister in laws grand daughter. I really use to love her when she was small. I helped her as much I could. But as she grown and got good job started to avoid me show attitude towards me same thing was done my her mother and her aunt. It heart me much. To take revenge of it I heart her at the time when she came to invite me for wedding. I did not attend her marriage. I insulted her at her pregrency ceremony. some where I feel I am guilty. But more time I feel why I should feel guilty I am just answering the way she, her mother and her aunt behaved with me. God make me a good woomen I do not want to be a revengeful woman. God not only towards her but not towards any of the person in the world whosoever he/she may be, how much attitute they mayshow My words should be soft. My heart should be clear. God help me, God help me God help me. Please, Please, Please. Make me humble and sweet speeking person. thanks

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# 3197 - by Anonymous / November 4, 2009
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Anonymous

by Anonymous on Nov 5, 2009 at 5:35 AM

Hello? God? You there? Nope, didn't think so.

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Anonymous

by Anonymous on Nov 5, 2009 at 12:24 PM

You want to talk about a betrayal of trust by a family member? I was an only kid and my mom died when I was 9. I was left with only my dad. I do not know how it came about, but by the time I was 11, my dad was having sex with me. My dad had me convinced that it was a good thing. I was making him feel good and I guess that because it was something that made me feel good I never questioned it.

As our sexual relationship went, not only did my dad get bolder, in my own preteen brain, I got bolder. I thought I was making my father happy and I was getting mine also. Dad taped us together many times. I have a couple of those tapes that I keep around I don't know why. The earliest videos are the worst ones. I am about 11 in them. It is so obvious I am a little girl, but I am sucking this adult man's dick. He keeps interupting me with questions, "What does it feel like in your mouth? Can you tell I am going to cum before I say so?"

I am smiling the whole time. You can tell I am trying to get him off and I look so proud of myself when I do and don't spill a drop. I know it was abuse, but I have never been able to reconcile the fact that once I got good at it, once I was getting off, I initiated it with my father at least half the time.

Many were the times that he was watching TV and I would be the one who would unzip his pants and go to town on him. One of my therapists once said I did this to preserve my space and keep him out of my room. What about the times I used this as foreplay? The times I sucked on his cock long enough to give him a massive hardon and stopped, then I reminded him that I would finish what I started in my room once the game was over.

What about the weekend mornings that I went into his room and woke him up with a blowjob. The nights that I went into his room naked just to have sex? Were those times his fault also? Was he so good at manipulating me that I was begging to be fucked at times? Was I so brainwashed that if a week went by and I go no sexual attentions from him I went nuts.

A couple of days after I turned 14 he tried to fuck me in the ass. I thought that he was crossing a line and told him so. He cut me off sexually completely. No blowjobs, no fucking, no getting my pussy ate. He closed the door to his room and locked it at night. He would not answer it if I knocked.

A week was all I could stand. I slipped a note under his door a week after he cut me off letting him know that my ass was his if he wanted it.

That fucker was all the family I had left in the world and he betrayed me.

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Anonymous

by Anonymous on Nov 7, 2009 at 2:25 AM

Jeez! How long did it go on between your dad and you? Has that played havoc with your adult relationships.

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Anonymous

by Anonymous on Jan 15, 2010 at 4:33 PM

i remember always slippin under the covers when he slept to do that also. that proud feeling for swallowing every drop prevailed in me too. my daddy and i never, ever mention how i nursed him. it was like out of sight, out of mind and as i always stayed under the covers we never saw each other.

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