I am putting this in the dreams and wishes category as there is a specific reason as to how all of this got started and is something I can not seem to stop, I wish and dream that things could be different in a way that would probably shock most people. if you feel you want to know how all this got started for me and why I do what I do, I will be glad to tell the entire story for you readers, and just so you know, this is one hundred percent true, it is not made up and it has consumed every minute of my time that I have when the wife and I are separated for any length of time and we are just that pretty often as she travels with her job sometimes, and sometimes to the point of being gone for extended periods of time with trips home on the weekends.

currently, she is working as a full time nanny for a couple that live a couple of hours from here and she stays there during the week and travels home only on the weekends leaving me home alone during the week, she has been doing this for over two years now and what I am about to tell you has consumed a tremendous amount of my time during the time that she is not here. this is a huge confession for me and there is something that happened in my life that caused me to now be obsessed with what I do, if I get good reviews from the readers then I will share the rest of the story background to tell you about how what I do all came about and that one night in my life that actually started it all.


basically what I am obsessed with and what I enjoy doing to the point of craving it all the time is,

I get so incredibly turned on by putting on and wearing a pair of my wifes very sexy panties and inviting a man over or meeting one in a hotel room that either I or he gets, and I crave to be down on my knees in her panties and have his cock in my mouth and sucking him until he is nice and hard and then standing up and turning around and offering him my ass as he knows he is getting it as the entire reason he is here. I love to feel a mans hands on my panty covered ass, playing with it, squeezing it and fondling it just like he would do to a woman, I love to bend over my bed or a bed or a couch and feel him fondle my ass and when he slides his fingers underneath the waistband of the panties to pull them down, I get a rush of euphoria, my knees get weak, I get so incredibly turned on as I feel her panties or my panties being pulled down and knowing that he is about to fuck me like he would fuck a woman, It is an intense overwhelming feeling that I can not explain.

when he pulls my panties down, the next thing I usually feel is him applying lubricant to me and he will begin to finger my very tight hole, maybe a slap or two on my ass, but then I feel the head of his incredibly hard 9 inch cock bump against my opening and feel him slowly push and begin to spread me open and feel his hands go to my hips as he holds me firm and pulls me back as he thrusts forward and sinks his cock to his balls and makes me moan and cry out with intense pleasure, my knees get so weak that I almost collapse and sometimes do collapse down on the bed.

he will start to thrust in and out, slowly at first, then faster, and the intense feeling of being penetrated and fucked like a woman is overwhelming for me, my little cock does not get hard but remains very soft and limp and as he starts to pound me like a woman, I feel the intensity build as he is pounding on my prostrate and the feeling gets so intense and so strong, I can feel the cum swelling up in my balls, the sensation of the intense and constant pounding of my male g spot takes over as I cry out that I am going to cum, he fucks me faster and harder, he is grunting and groaning and I moan and squeal with delight as I feel the cum start to pour from my little limp cock as it twitches and jerks, and then I feel the cycle starting all over again and I feel another orgasm building, moaning, panting, screaming, begging him to fuck me as he now slams his rock hard cock balls deep in my sissy little ass and I know this must be what it felt like that one night I was not supposed to see my wife and her friend fucking but I did, she has no idea that I not only know but I secretly watched as a man with a large cock had her bent over our bed and he was pounding her ass as she screamed and begged him to fuck her ass, begged him to fuck her ass harder, begged him to cum in her ass, screamed out that she was cumming, and as I feel his cock explode in me and feel his cum gush out around his cock and run down my balls as his cock is pulsing and jerking and he is holding that cock balls deep and filling me up with his hot load, all I can think about is what I witnessed that night that I secretly watched a complete stranger to me fuck my wifes ass as she begged him to do so and she was someone totally different than the wife that I loved and lived with everyday, she was like a complete whore for him, he fucked her like a ragdoll, we had or never have came close to fucking like that, but after seeing what I saw I was so incredibly and secretly turned on that I sought out to find out what it must be like to be fucked like that, I mean sex with a pussy, a man can never understand that, but the way I see it is anal sex with a woman and anal sex with a man is anal sex, either way, I wanted to know if a man could feel what a woman felt and if a man could cum from being anally fucked by another man.

what I learned in my search and through some trials and some let downs, I found a man with a nice thick rock hard nine inch cock that does not judge me, he enjoys pulling my panties down and fucking me as much or more than I love him doing it, yet it is completely no strings, he has been fucking me for over a year now and I have never seen his face except in a dark room, we have a mutual respect and understanding, we are both married, we get together when have the time and we both know what is going to happen and we do what we do and we go our separate ways until next time.

I have never told my wife about the night I saw her and that guy fucking, she has no idea that I know, but in a way I want her to know, I want her to know how much it turned me on, I wish and dream it could be different so maybe we could both share a man with a big thick hard cock so I could watch him fuck her and she could watch him fuck me, but yet, having my secret life and craving to be fucked like her while wearing her panties is what drives this new world I have discovered, I don't consider myself gay, yes I do now consider myself bi sexual, but I would never be in a relationship with a man, I would love to see her ass fucked again like that night I saw her and that guy, she was a complete different person than when she was with me, it was such a turn on and made me so jealous, but yet so raging hard at the same time, gave me the jitters, every time my friend fucks me I am reliving what I saw that night in my mind and imagining that I am her, I just wish and dream she would open up and release her inner whore for me, she has no idea what I would do for her!