I work 13+ hours a day, and by the time I get home I am so tired and my feet already hurt--I am just not interested in going out, but still wish someone was there in my bed to give me what I need.

I'm OK looking, not entirely unfortunate in the looks department, but I am so not a Victoria's Secret model, nor do I have the figure of stripper. I know I have like 30 pounds of padding that makes me a big girl, but I still need a human touch at night after chasing down network issues for longer than I have slept in the last couple of days. Something really needs to change.

A weekend or two a month I dress like a whore and go to a bar in the metro district. It doesn't take long for the "desperate big girl" to get picked up, the guys think they are using me, but really, I am using them, and when I wake up alone in that motel down the street, I am so glad I am alone. I don't like myself for this, but it makes me feel good for a while and takes the craziness of my job away for a few hours.