Hi Guys,

I am, or have been up until a couple of months ago a straight white male who has been meeting black guys online for sex.

I have been straight my entire life and around 6 months ago I split up with my long term girlfriend, it was a bad break up, she got nasty, I am sure I played my part and in the end I needed space from relationships, I had been in a series of heavy 3 - 4 year long relationships with women one after the other since my twenties.

I decided no way was I getting into another heavy situation for a while - so I started sleeping around a bit (Tinder is awesome!) - sex with all kinds of girls and I did my best to not get drawn in and start another relationship.

Now - I have always had a bit of a gay kink - always loved the idea of being submissive for a black guy, not other races really, but there's something about black dudes that always interested me. So in the spirit of having a good time - out of curiosity I got on Grindr and decided to see what happened. I put in my profile that I was interested in being submissive to black guys, that I was straight and it was a new thing for me, but I was turned on by the idea of sucking a black dick and taking it in the ass.

Well - I got a few responses! 3 or 4 the first couple of days so I started talking to some of the guys, sharing pictures and everything like that - as I got into it and guys are sending me pictures of their black dicks, I must admit I started to get really turned on at the possibilities.

BUT!

I was nervous about the whole thing, I had some aggressive guys at first demand we meet and fuck - which sounded great but for some reason I hesitated. I just couldn't get the courage to meet a guy, but I would beat off dreaming about sucking all these black cock pictures I had been sent - it was driving me crazy!!!

Until one day I got a message from a guy - Jayson - handsome nice guy, respectful (he didn't even send a dick pic) and we talked about all kinds of non sexual stuff, he made me feel at ease so we eventually got on the phone and set a "date" for the next day.

Well I couldn't concentrate at work, had butterflies in my stomach - like what the hell am I doing - am I really going to have date with a gay black guy and maybe have gay sex for the first time that night??

Evening came around and we met at a Chinese restaurant for dinner - his choice as it was near his place. It was instant chemistry, something I wasn't expecting, this guy did not seem gay at all - it was crazy to me - very masculine dude - he is a landscaper - we talked about everything from movies to music to politics and we discovered we have a lot in common. We finished up dinner and he asked if I wanted to see his place - he described the back garden to me that he designed and it sounded amazing.

We walked to his place from the restaurant - I was giggling as we both had a few glasses of wine - his house was really nice and humble inside - but the garden was really incredible! Huge trees, cool lighting strung up everywhere and a sort of open tree house / balcony he built with seating and a bar. I was seriously impressed!

So we went up to the balcony - You could see the whole city from up there - he poured me another drink and we sat down. THEN - he went for it - leaned in to kiss me - I was nervous but I kissed him back and it felt awesome, I could feel my dick growing in my pants - he asked if he was the first guy I ever kissed - I said yes and I told him I liked it - we kissed some more - then he put my hand on his pants where he had a raging boner! He asked if I wanted to see it - I shyly said yes - and so he took it out - IT WAS BEAUTIFUL - thick, black, kind of half uncut, not huge but I'd say a perfect 7" - my heart started racing - all the times I had been alone staring at black dicks and here I was face to face with one.

I reached over and stroked it - he moaned - I stroked it some more - he asked if I wanted to suck it - I did!!! Badly! I got on my knees and slid his black pole into my mouth - my nerves went away - I looked up at him - he smiled down and I did what seemed to come naturally! Who knew I had such a talent - I pushed it deep into my mouth, tonguing all around the base of his cock, licking up and down. He put his hands on the back of my head and guided me up and down - he seemed to be enjoying it and so was I. After a while I really started going crazy, slurping and sucking like I was possessed - he slowed me down and told me he wasn't ready to cum yet.

I have to say at this point I WAS HOOKED! I could have sucked him all night - but he had other plans - he told me to take my pants off and show him my ass. I wasn't so shy anymore and I stood up and stripped down - pants and boxers off - he could see my hard on - which made him smile - he told me to bend over and open my ass cheeks - so I leaned over the rail on the balcony and did just that.

Suddenly I felt something wet and sticky around my asshole - he was applying lube to my ass - I looked around and noticed he had a stash of lubes, toys and condoms in a drawer - made me wonder how many times he had done this!

He told me to relax, I braced myself for what was to come as he started to push his hard dick into my tight pink asshole - I was tense!! I didn't know what to expect - but I wanted it so bad - the more he pushed I started to feel full - but he had only got the tip in there - he rocked back and forth - until the whole dick slid in my ass - I saw stars!!! It was incredible - I just held on to the railing as he started to pound my ass - part of me wondered if he had actually put a condom on - part of me - most of me didn't care at all - this was heaven. He body pounding into mine stretching my asshole around his beautiful black dick, I never wanted him to stop - he told me to beat my dick while he fucked me so we could cum together - I did just that - it was wonderful - he groaned heavily, pounding away at my tight pink hole - he finally pulled me in close as he came - at the same time I beat my dick as fast as I could and I shot cum all over the balcony.

WOW!!

So that happened - we went and chilled on the couch no pants on, he put some music on - we drunk more wine and I blew him again, this time I swallowed his cum (which I LOVED) - then I went home! Feeling like my whole world had changed!!

This first happened 2 months ago - we have seen each other quite a lot since, the sex is incredible - I am a total slave to his beautiful black dick - here's the thing - he asked me the other day about being in a relationship! and I am really torn - for a lot of reasons. Firstly I told myself I do not want to get involved with anybody and secondly I don't really want to come out as gay! He said nobody has to know and its true when we are out we are just like a couple of straight friends. I also do not want to stop having sex with him, part of me would love to come home to him and take his dick every night.

A side bar to this is - I have got a little more confident and I have had sex with a few other black guys from Grindr. Last week I met one young 19 year old guy at a motel room, skinny dark black guy with a big dick! We smoked a ton of weed and he fucked the shit out of me like a piece of meat (it was AWESOME) and I gave one guy - a security guard - a blow job in his car late at night. I felt kind of bad for doing that then going to see Jay and talking about relationships.

Now I have got the taste for black dick - I kind of don't want to stop, I got off Grindr but guys I gave my number to are hitting me up all the time, I have two guys who want to pull a train on me which I am so curious about - 2 black cocks at the same time!!! but also I really, really like Jay and I am so confused on what to do!!

Anyway guys - thanks for reading!!!