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- My Family -
Straight Male / 49

I've been a smoker since I was sixteen. About four months ago I made the decision to quit. I was overdue for a physical anyway so I asked the doctor for a prescription for Chantix. It took me three weeks to work up the motivation to start taking them. I suppose my mistake was to not tell my wife I had started taking the Chantix.

I'd been taking the Chantix for about 3 days when my wife comes to me and delivers an ultimatum. No more sex until I start taking the Chantix and quit smoking. My first reaction was shock as in where the fuck did that come from??? My second reaction was anger she would use our intimate time as a bargaining chip. My anger had nothing to do with being denied sex. To be honest my libido isn't what it used to be. While I still get horny and definitely still enjoy sex, it's not an overwhelming urge anymore. I was pissed off she was trying to manipulate me that way. I essentially told her ok, fine and did my best to hide my anger. I didn't tell her I had already started taking the Chantix.

After that night I became a little distant with her. Not intentionally, it just kind of happened. Eight days after starting the Chantix I had my last cigarette. At this point I still hadn't told her I was taking it and I didn't bother letting her know I had bought my last pack of smokes. It took about a week for her to notice I wasn't heading outside to smoke anymore. She gushed over me and told me how proud she was etc.. and I know she was trying to be supportive, but she just managed to irritate me with all of it. She asked me when I had started and why I didn't say anything. I told her I had started taking the Chantix 3 days before her little ultimatum and that I just didn't feel like saying anything about it after that. I could tell she was upset with me, but she tried to drag me into the bedroom to "reward me". That really pissed me off. I told her I zero interest in "reward" sex and I really wasn't in the mood.

That was about three months ago and we still haven't had sex. That's the longest stretch since our kids were born. The other day I come home from work and she greets me wearing a garter belt, stockings, high heels and nothing else. I was shocked to find out that I still had little to no interest in having sex with her. Six months ago I couldn't have gotten out of my clothes fast enough. As it was I tried to pretend to be excited, but she literally had to blow me for 15 minutes before I got hard and when I did get hard it didn't last. We had a long talk after that and I was honest with her. I told her I just have zero interest in sex now. By the end of the conversation she was pissed off at me and accusing me of being petty and intentionally sabotaging our sex life to "teach her a leson". We really haven't talked much since.

I'm not really looking for anything here. I just needed someplace to vent.

9
# 38399 - by Anonymous / December 13, 2017
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Comments

Anonymous

by Anonymous on Dec 13, 2017 at 12:47 PM

Shes already cheating on you. Prepare for a divorce, dummy.

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Anonymous

by Anonymous on Dec 13, 2017 at 3:11 PM

Lol, unless she can manipulate time and space, no she's not already cheating.

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Anonymous

by Anonymous on Dec 13, 2017 at 5:15 PM

What are you? A man, or a little boy crying, boohoo?

Smokes is bad for you. She wanted good for you, and this is how you pay her, acting like a fucking kid who didn't got any present?

She knew those pills would help and she wanted to encourage you. Instead of waiting them to work, she wanted you to keep in mind what you would lose if you are not man enough to give up smoking.

She knew you were not man enough. And you showed it to her.

Quit bullshitting yourself that it was somehow her fault, you are not a man enough for her you fucking loser.

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Anonymous

by Anonymous on Dec 13, 2017 at 7:15 PM

I'll confess. Probably to late for you but I'm sure my confession will help some. Let's go back to where it all began. People don't believe me when I tell them that I once smoked, or went through, 4 packs of cigarettes daily. Sound impossible? It's true but back then I was in the military and only paid $3 or less for a carton. On the ship returning from overseas they sold for $1 a carton, 10 cents a pack so I stocked up pretty well before the ship docked. I'll admit that often I'd have 2 cigarettes lite at once. Get busy doing something and light up when I already had one going. Anyway, let me tell you, it's practically impossible to quit when someone is constantly on your ass to quit. It's something that you want to do yourself and that's where this begins. After my retirement I got a job as a traveling salesman just to have something to do. One beautiful spring day, fresh air outside, I returned home and entered my home. My sister was there with her young daughter, probably less than 1 year, and she was leaving so I sat down, lit a cigarette and laid it in the ash tray and helped my sister and the baby and her bags out to her car. Upon reentering my home from the fresh outside air, the smell of that cigarette hit me in the face and I'll admit. it was terrible. I said to myself right then, "If this is what it smells like to others I'll never be guilty again. I went cold turkey. In other words, when I had a desire I would light one up, inhale on giant puff, hold it inside as long as I could then exhale and put the cigarette out. The next time I had a desire I'd light that same cigarette, take a deep inhale and repeat the first. I'm telling you, after 4 or 5 times with the same cigarette it begins to taste like hell. Now, when I was on the road with my job I always kept my cigarettes in the trunk of my car. For those of you who smoke, you know that if your cigarettes are laying beside you, you will unconsciously catch yourself lighting one up. So, I quit smoking about 40 years ago and today I never have a desire at all. Now, for those who smoke and want to quit but find it difficult, follow my method. I'll guarantee it works.
Don't depend on those pills, etc, advertised on the TV and/or computer. Most are rip-offs just after your money. When I see smokers who hate themselves for smoking I never condemn them, I know what it's like to want a smoke. I tell them of my method and have had many to quit without spending on penny for the advice.

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Anonymous

by Anonymous on Dec 14, 2017 at 2:01 PM

I understand feeling angry or manipulated by the wife. And now, it has fucked with your big head and your little head. I'd suggest getting some little blue pills to help out. In fact, after you have a raging boner from a pill, stick it in her ass as payback.

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Anonymous

by Anonymous on Dec 14, 2017 at 2:10 PM

Do your research. Quitting smoking Will initially lower your sex drive. It can last awhile but will come back. In the meantime you should still take care of her. There were probably times she did it an didn't want to.

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Anonymous

by Anonymous on Dec 27, 2017 at 7:30 AM

Ask her to hand over her dildoe and give that bitch a good fucking

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Anonymous

by Anonymous on Dec 28, 2017 at 2:38 AM

Know what you mean brother. Seen others go through it, and though I've never smoked, went through something similar with alcohol. She was going to give me bj's before work, handjobs on the go and fucking me every possible way at night for every day sober. Sounds good, right? Might be as long as it is convenient for her. Or when she wants it. But many times I wasn't in the mood, or didn't have time, or knowing she'd want to make it all about her needs wasn't in the mood to please her when my own needs weren' met. These wives cop this attitude like it's really going to force or jump start you with some great motivation to quit, whatever the vice may be, but all they are trying to do is gaslight you into something for their own selfish purpose which is a major turn off. Enough of it and the bitch become totally repulsive and can offer to give it up every day, all day, for the rest of our lives but man you just can't take it, don't want it, and all their efforts do nothing but drive you away from it and them. It is especially bad when she has some god awful trait or habit that she will never give up even though you've politely asked her time and time again. Somethings will just have to get worked out on their own and this is one of them for you. Chantix is a great treatment but it does have some major side effects. She is just going to have to give you space and time to deal with this on your own. Intentional or not, she is going to be taught a lesson called karma if nothing else. You'll probably end up picking and choosing your spots like I did until you can be free from smoking and free from the effects of the treatment. In my case ironically, my getting off of the bottle while she started hitting the bottle made her more appealing and things more tolerable. As in case, do what you have to do and see where things go. Good luck man.

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Anonymous

by Anonymous on Jan 1, 2018 at 9:34 AM

The posts on here don't get it and a lot of them are written by women who probably use the same manipulative strategy.

It's not about smoking. It's about using as a weapon and a tool of emotional manipulation. Women think it's good to use it in this way without understanding that it destroys the very basis of any relationship. It's blackmailing a person to get your way. I've never heard of anyone ever talk of blackmail in a positive way.

My ex wife did the same and I reacted the way you did. I refused to have sex with her for 8 months.

When a woman does this, she is giving you license to stray.

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