I am a first generation born American. My parents immigrated to attend college. My mother's best friend also immigrated here and they have been best friends all their life. As it turned out my mother had me five years after her friend had him. They both have other children.

I was fourteen. My mother called me to the kitchen and her friend and him were sitting at the table. I was told to take my place. I was told that he was going to go off to college. He was told that he left with visions of spreading his seed but he had his woman here. To pay close attention, that his woman was sitting at the table with him and they were sure his woman was not giving him permission to spread his seed in other women. As for me, I was to consider myself his wife. True I was a girl but I was also a woman. I was his wife.

That was it. We were left sitting at the table. We sat in silence for a long time until we got up and left.

Later that night, when we were home, my mother came to talk to me. She said it was just what had to be. I was too young to go with him, and he was too young to behave himself. Before he left I had to make sure that he enjoyed his wife. I was to get into the middle of his brain so the only thing he thought about was coming home to enjoy his wife.

He enjoyed his wife before he left. I can't really say that I enjoyed my husband until I was much older, in my mid twenties. By then I was in desperation to have a child, I was willing to tolerate anything from him.