I am divorced and semi retired. I work partime for my old company in an advisory capacity and get paid decently well for it. To be truthful it is part of the retirement program. You get a package, you officially retire, you get to work part time as a consultant and after a couple of years you are out on your own. I know that so I am not complaining. It is the divorced thing that I am complaining about.

When I was married and I worked the proverbial sunrise to sunset I was never alone. Now I am alone, and I don't work sunrise to sunset and I got home and I don't have anything to do. I am not a hobby guy and I don't play golf, or fish or any of those outside activities. What I do now is masturbate. I find myself masturbating. At first it was like wank off, but now it is a whole planned event. I am right now trying some anal lubes and plugs, I find it very enjoyable and it really helps get me in the mood.

For a while there I watched porn but pussy doesn't do it for me anymore. Panties do and I have tried wearing panties to masturbate and that helps. And a mirror helps and a video helps. I can masturbate better if I watch a video of myself in panties masturbating. I masturbate a lot, I buy anal lube by the gallon and I have several plugs of different sizes and I use a nice sized dildo to fuck myself. I have an overly big mirror in my room on a wall where I can enjoy watching myself. It is pretty sick.

Now to add to the mystery of getting old I met a guy who has a small business distributing products for an internet sales company. His business is packaging and delivering. The internet company gets the order, they pass it on to him and he puts together the product (things like honey, chocolates, nuts) and send them out in a nice neat packages. His work hours vary. In any event I met him and he invited me to his warehouse. He has a nice setup, he calls it his get away mancave. He has a nice sofa, a full screen TV, a nice computer setup and the warehouse in the back. No one bothers him.

We sat there and watched a ball game and we talked. All during the ball game I thought about what a neat set up, and I thought what if I offered to suck his cock. I am open to it, we could put on a movie and I would suck his cock for him. Crazy stuff, thinking about sucking his cock. But since I went to his mancave I have thought about it every day. I masturbate to the idea, I watch videos of men sucking cock, and I think of myself sucking his cock. I lube myself up, use one of my plugs, use my dildo and I suck on it and masturbate dreaming of being in his mancave, sucking him while he sits on the couch.