Madam Noir.

I moved to Tempe Arizona for a job. I moved into a complex and next door to me lived a woman in red. She is originally from Washington D.C. and moved here after she retired. According to her she was married to the deep dark secret agent kind of guy but won't say much more except that he has passed away. I worked and came home about the same time every day and she would come over and talk. I talked because I thought she was lonely and I didn't have anyone to talk to either. Then one day she tells me this story.

Seems she was young then, learning how to work in the big government office world when she met her husband, a seasoned agent and all who was back from a far away assignment. Seems that he had been without for some time because he took her to satisfy his needs. She said she was all virgin and nineteen and he was an older man. She complained but to no effect and he did his nasty deed. While she was trying to put herself back together he took her face in his hand and told her she would do, and she did. From then on when he needed to relieve his needs he came to her.

Twenty years later he decided to retire, he was well past the government retirement age, he told her to get her things together and took her to live in a small town in Virginia where she and him were supposed to melt into the crowd. She claims that he was old and his peter no longer worked so she found herself high and dry and she had needs and she didn't know where to go. And she found a sweet old lady schoolmarm who told her that her best friend was her rolling pin. How so, she asked and the little old schoolmarm held the rolling pin in her hand and told her to hold the other handle and asked her what it felt like and then taking the rolling pin in both hands she took the handle and shoved it against her parts. No it couldn't be, but it was and she went out and bought a rolling pin which she buttered up and went to town.

That is what she wanted to tell me, that I needed a rolling pin for when I got home. It wasn't healthy keeping all to myself and if I wanted I could borrow her rolling pin. Well she got up and went next door and came back with her rolling pin, she took it in her two hands and shoved the handle up against her parts and said something like she could see God and told me to take it before it became too late for her and go hide it under my bed for later on. That night I saw God.