I fell off the wagon, lost my job and ended up living in my car. I was getting food from the shelters, the Food Bank, panhandling, stealing. A man offered help, held up a twenty and when I reached for it he said I had to earn it. I needed alcohol and the twenty would get me that. A cock was a cheap price. It was easy money and I started negotiating, got some clothes and a haircut, hung around bars downtown and was making a hundred a night. I was sleeping drunk in my car, passed out with cock taste in my mouth. The more I did it, the more I liked it, the better I got at it, the more money I made, the more receptive I was to go behind the dumpster and drop my pants.

I am back in AA and have a job as a handyman at a motel. Part of my pay is a room in the back under the stairwell. I get off, go downtown, suck cock or go with the man to where he wants to fuck. I make between one fifty and two hundred when I hang out. I met a man who works at the Firestone next to the motel. Him I suck for free, he fucks me for free, he stays with me overnight for free, and when he comes over I don't head downtown to make a few bucks.