i have a problem with guys and their pants. i like wrangler jeans because the leave nothing to the imagination, which i have none of. you see, all the guys at my school wear these pants that have enough fabric to complete a complete orange couch. as you can see, i'm encredibly off-balance. i find both men and women attractive, but i am really turned on by cows. i dream of cows in my sleep; bulls, heffers, calves, and in some cases large dogs ( i don't know if that's even related to this problem). i think my obssesion with cows is what lead me to love tight jeans, cows are so...naked. i have to go now, my sister/uncle/cousin is coming to help us slaughter the pig.

sincerely,

Jesus