Role Models

I do not understand how my parents are together, and I never have. But they are in their early 50s and more into each other than just about anyone else's parents I've met.

My dad looks like one of those punk rock cooking chefs - tattooed sleeves, kind of a greaser hairdo, works on old cars (he has this gorgeous black '70 Skylark that one day will be mine). He's the stoic type, and no other woman exists outside of mom.

My mom, I hate to say it, looks like a white trash bimbo. I love her but she's always looked kind of plastic and is genuinely ditzy. So much pink, big sunglasses, dressing way below her age but still rocking it. No matter, she's absolutely crazy about my dad and is a good mom.

Growing up, I was probably raised in the most sex positive house you could imagine. I walked in on them having sex probably two dozen times - I caught her sucking his cock, him pounding her in the garage, or just heard her talk dirty to him (she can't whisper for shit) or make lewd gestures at him on the regular. We had many talks about what I had been exposed to as a kid. I knew what a blowjob was before middle school, for example, and how many fingers should be used when getting finger fucked (apparently dad's specialty). But they always told me that doing things like that was special and I should only do that for someone I really cared about that cared about me. I believe in that personally - my hotness is a g*ft for someone, not a toy.

Anyway, so obviously I'm home for Thanksgiving from college, and I've been away from them and that made me bold. So after dinner last night we were out on the back deck having wine, just me and mom. I'd never asked her before, but I was feeling brave so I blurted out "how are you two together?"

And she told me that the guy she was with before Dad was an asshole, always basically using her and not seeing her as a person. One night, he tried to force her into anal, and when she resisted, he hit her - gave her a black eye. She left that night, went to move in with her best friend for awhile (my "Aunt" Lucy) and Lucy introduced her to my Dad during that time. Lucy apparently was feeling out my Dad for herself, but realizing my mom needed someone that would treat her better she set them up. I was shocked, I'd never heard this story and it's kind of terrible on a couple of levels. Also, what could have been, right?

On one of their first dates she still had the black eye and was feeling super self conscious about it and was trying to hide that side of her face all night. My dad lifted her chin, told her she was beautiful, and kissed her bruise. Mom said that was it, and giggling a bit, she knew right there she was going to be his slut for the rest of her life. She said slut, too - I'm not making that up. When you find a man like that, you do anything to keep him, she said.

Except for anal, she said, incredibly serious.

"Your dad gets enough of this good good, no anal."

My wonderful mother, everyone. I love these two weirdos. Happy Thanksgiving.