My Dark Inner-thoughts

I do not know why, but I constantly find myself with dark thoughts flowing throughout my head when I am alone at home during the day... I often find myself obsessing over pictures of real women that I see on the internet and imagining them nude, or imagining having real hardcore sex with a few women that I saw on camera once or twice, and find myself frequenting sites with fake r**e from movies... that, in addition to dirty talking anonymously, and fantasizing about r****g women. That, and I can delve into disturbing thoughts of violence, destruction, and pettiness when I have to deal with people I hate for even the smallest reasons, before welling up with self-loathing for those types of thoughts.

Despite these, I seem much more mindful and pleasant in the company of others and keep myself mostly in control, but sometimes I worry I might completely lose myself if stuff gets stressful.... I've got a slightly short temper and some self-control issues, and that might not even have anything to do with my things, I worry what might happen if I ever become unhinged somehow, like going insane or just drinking too much alcohol to the point where I get drunk. (That last one especially hurts since I do get buzzed easily)

Am I just being silly, or is that all a bad sign?