Anxiety Driven Deepest Fantasy

These feelings are so confusing. I am a genderfluid gal (she and they) who while born male wants to have a dick, pussy, and boobs. Currently only have a 6.5 inch dick, barley b-cup tits, and no pussy.

Now onto my dream confession.

I want to be used like a slab of meat for a bunch of women.

Relentlessly.
Endlessly.
Longingly.

I want to be nothing more than a toy to be passed around other women and used as nothing more than a slut for them to play with. Let them suck and fuck my dick, eat out my pussy, and even suck and fuck my tits to their hearts content. I want them to stick anything in my pussy, in my mouth, force a dog or a plug in me, even make me swallow my own cum or take it and force it into my own pussy as a power play to make me suffer.

I don't want to be treated like a human, I want to be a toy. Stand me up, lay me down, slap me, scratch me, break me always. I don't want it to stop.

I want hands all around me, choking me, scratching me, beating me, making me beg for release in any sense if the word.

To make things worse, part of why I am scared of these dreams and wishes is because there is no limit to how far I want it to go. I am terrified of men, they scare me to death. I was r**ed ad a child and that's why I am not a man myself. But in this dream the thought comes, and comes often.

Since I want to be just a slab of meat, there is no end to it and that includes being fucked by a man. Being held down by the hoards of women as they bring a man into the room. Helping him force his way into my pussy, defiling my body with his cock and filling me with his semen. Scream against hands as he fucks my ass, watching as I am helpless as he has his way with my pathetic body.

I hate men and the thought sends a pit into my stomach, however, I want it so bad. I want to please mistresses, I want to be their plaything, I want to be less then human... I just want to be their happy slut. Not the pathetic life I live where I am stuck in a broken body that can't even please her own wife....

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