Bi-Sexual Female / 48
My Story
I'd like to tell my story and this site seems as good a way as any-better then most actually. Of course there are friends who know, trusted friends and others I'm sure. I don't consider my life choices wrong although many would, or would at least wag their tongues due to my sexual non-conformity. I supposed if I'd grown up now rather than then I'd blend in more readily.
I love sex, I love sex with people I care about and sometimes with people who simply attract me and intrigue me. I'm also married and therein lies the issue. I used to believe that monogamy was "normal" and that we as humans were meant for one other and no more. Any sexual experiences outside of a monogamic relationship was a sign of moral weakness, a surrender to physical urges only those of weak character fail to resist.
I no longer believe this, in fact I live my life in complete opposite to this. I believe that consensual sex is the most beautiful interaction that can happen between two people, and that monogamy is a false construct originally designed to subjugate women and as a means to unsure property holding from generation to generation and that it's unnatural to expect men or women to live their entire lives beholding to only one other unless of course its that individual's personality to do so in which case it's perfect for them. It is just rare in my opinion for people to truly be satisfied with that arrangement.
I met my husband at 19, both virgins, married at 23, still virgins, we fought our urges and desires and frustrations to get to our wedding night where we finally had sex and it was a huge letdown. Over time it got better much better. We were both left wondering-Why did we wait until we were married? There are means of avoiding unplanned pregnancy-what was gained by living through years of sexual frustration? My friends were getting laid at 16 and 17 years old, enjoying healthy sex lives and were all married and had children and pre-marital sex didn't harm them at all. I was left feeling left out-that I'd missed so much. In speaking with my husband, he felt the same way. All the times we avoided sex with each other and others basically for nothing.
I developed this internal need to satisfy my husband sexually to make up for what we felt we missed. Our sex life was great and life was great. In our early thirties a close friend of his divorced and needed a place to stay. We welcomed him into our home which ended up lasting for a few years. He was a wonderful guy, a great help in and outside the house and a great friend. But. I developed a need, a hunger to please him the way I pleased my husband. It's hard to explain, it wasn't a need born of sexual attraction it was a need born of closeness, of living together, of sharing a home with a man who was alone, who lacked affection and sexual satisfaction. At first I thought it was just me feeling sorry for him, but then it became clear to me as the woman in a household of two men, it was incumbent upon me to provide each with the love and affection they needed while satisfying my own needs both emotionally and sexually. It began to feel like an unfulfilled responsibility.
I sort of accomplished this in subtle ways, lots of hugs, cheek kisses, rubbing his back, his arms, momentarily of course but the closeness was there. Slowly some hand holding, head resting, hair stroking by me and I felt very close to him and thought he was at least getting some affection and female closeness. I began to notice he would get an erection many times when he would lay his head in my lap or I'd just be touching him, it was obvious and it would stir me, stir arousal and need, the need to satisfy him and through that myself.
One night, watching a movie with my husband sitting on one side of me, and him on the other, we were all snuggled up, keeping warm, and he grew hard. I could see it, he made no effort to hide it, it's a natural thing but I wanted to touch him, give him some pleasure, maybe just a little and I reached out and let my fingers slide up and down his shaft gently tracing his shaft and head, feeling it jump and twitch, knowing how much he probably needed relief, wanting to just take it out and grant it. During the movie, I would periodically caress his cock and then nearing the end I felt his hand on my breast, a soft touch, a squeeze, a hand on my thigh, a brief touch between my legs. Afterwards, my husband made furious love to me.
Then he asked about me touching our friend, and him touching me. I tried to explain as I've done here. He understood, asked if we'd been having sex, the answer was no, asked if it was fair to him that I would satisfy my need to give him affection then have my sexual needs met in my marital bed where he would have to satisfy himself. And no, it wasn't. I had given him some attention which filled my need but I left him unsatisfied. I also noticed that my husband wasn't upset about what I had done if anything he felt if anything I should have gone further.
A week later, we'd been close, nothing much said about what happened, me thinking maybe he'd proposition me or at least touch me, my ass or maybe my breasts but he didn't.
Friday night, movie night, he said he was looking forward to watching a movie which I took as he was hoping for a replay. That night we did decide to watch a movie. I boldly shook things up saying to my husband how about we go down to the bedroom to watch the movie. He was confused but said ok. As we headed down, our roomie John said "goodnight" I said "aren't you coming?" I said "you can join us it's just more comfortable".
So he joined us. I was in the middle between the two men. I felt safe and emotionally secure and really enjoyed the warmth and touch of two men snuggled up to me. I was wearing one of my husband's shirts. I'd taken off my leggings before getting into bed and was nude from the waist down, purposefully. I knew what I wanted to do, knew I wanted to please both men, was nervous about being the aggressor and worried how my husband would react.
During the movie, I found my husband's cock and caressed it, then found John's and caressed his. John played with my breast nearest his. I took my top off, rolled over and took John's cock into my mouth. In my mind I felt that being nude would signal to John that he could take me if he wanted to. I sucked his cock, took my time using my mouth and tongue to pleasure him as best I could. I took a very long time and enjoyed every moan and groan I drew from him.
My husband was touching me, rubbing my ass and pussy but mostly watching. John took me, rolled me on my back and kissed me deeply, he made out with me then spent a long time sucking my breasts, caressing me, feeling my pussy, sliding his fingers in, using his tongue on my clit to make me cum, then making me cum again.
He pressed his cock against my pussy and slowly slid in, I lifted my knees spreading myself open for him to take me. He slowly slid in and out, his cock slowly grew stiffer, he fucked me faster and faster then harder and then he was close. he fucked me hard to a beautiful orgasm while my husband caressed my breasts. John kissed me when he came then lay on top of me. He rolled off, I cleaned up but when John went to leave, my husband invited him to spend the night. John watched my husband and I have sex and participated through some kissing and touching.
After that night, we had a three way relationship where I was often with both men either together or individually. I loved giving John head-he enjoyed it so much. They were both great lovers and being available to both was very fulfilling for me.
John ended up moving to another state chasing his career and my husband and I were once again monogamous but that didn't last. We've brought others into our relationship, both men and women and hopefully will continue to do so.
I enjoy meeting new people, becoming close, seeing where the relationship will bring us and if it follows a certain path reveling in the physical and emotional impact it brings. The first time I have sex with another person always provides a powerful emotional and physical boost.
That's my somewhat unconventional confession my thanks for listening.
I love sex, I love sex with people I care about and sometimes with people who simply attract me and intrigue me. I'm also married and therein lies the issue. I used to believe that monogamy was "normal" and that we as humans were meant for one other and no more. Any sexual experiences outside of a monogamic relationship was a sign of moral weakness, a surrender to physical urges only those of weak character fail to resist.
I no longer believe this, in fact I live my life in complete opposite to this. I believe that consensual sex is the most beautiful interaction that can happen between two people, and that monogamy is a false construct originally designed to subjugate women and as a means to unsure property holding from generation to generation and that it's unnatural to expect men or women to live their entire lives beholding to only one other unless of course its that individual's personality to do so in which case it's perfect for them. It is just rare in my opinion for people to truly be satisfied with that arrangement.
I met my husband at 19, both virgins, married at 23, still virgins, we fought our urges and desires and frustrations to get to our wedding night where we finally had sex and it was a huge letdown. Over time it got better much better. We were both left wondering-Why did we wait until we were married? There are means of avoiding unplanned pregnancy-what was gained by living through years of sexual frustration? My friends were getting laid at 16 and 17 years old, enjoying healthy sex lives and were all married and had children and pre-marital sex didn't harm them at all. I was left feeling left out-that I'd missed so much. In speaking with my husband, he felt the same way. All the times we avoided sex with each other and others basically for nothing.
I developed this internal need to satisfy my husband sexually to make up for what we felt we missed. Our sex life was great and life was great. In our early thirties a close friend of his divorced and needed a place to stay. We welcomed him into our home which ended up lasting for a few years. He was a wonderful guy, a great help in and outside the house and a great friend. But. I developed a need, a hunger to please him the way I pleased my husband. It's hard to explain, it wasn't a need born of sexual attraction it was a need born of closeness, of living together, of sharing a home with a man who was alone, who lacked affection and sexual satisfaction. At first I thought it was just me feeling sorry for him, but then it became clear to me as the woman in a household of two men, it was incumbent upon me to provide each with the love and affection they needed while satisfying my own needs both emotionally and sexually. It began to feel like an unfulfilled responsibility.
I sort of accomplished this in subtle ways, lots of hugs, cheek kisses, rubbing his back, his arms, momentarily of course but the closeness was there. Slowly some hand holding, head resting, hair stroking by me and I felt very close to him and thought he was at least getting some affection and female closeness. I began to notice he would get an erection many times when he would lay his head in my lap or I'd just be touching him, it was obvious and it would stir me, stir arousal and need, the need to satisfy him and through that myself.
One night, watching a movie with my husband sitting on one side of me, and him on the other, we were all snuggled up, keeping warm, and he grew hard. I could see it, he made no effort to hide it, it's a natural thing but I wanted to touch him, give him some pleasure, maybe just a little and I reached out and let my fingers slide up and down his shaft gently tracing his shaft and head, feeling it jump and twitch, knowing how much he probably needed relief, wanting to just take it out and grant it. During the movie, I would periodically caress his cock and then nearing the end I felt his hand on my breast, a soft touch, a squeeze, a hand on my thigh, a brief touch between my legs. Afterwards, my husband made furious love to me.
Then he asked about me touching our friend, and him touching me. I tried to explain as I've done here. He understood, asked if we'd been having sex, the answer was no, asked if it was fair to him that I would satisfy my need to give him affection then have my sexual needs met in my marital bed where he would have to satisfy himself. And no, it wasn't. I had given him some attention which filled my need but I left him unsatisfied. I also noticed that my husband wasn't upset about what I had done if anything he felt if anything I should have gone further.
A week later, we'd been close, nothing much said about what happened, me thinking maybe he'd proposition me or at least touch me, my ass or maybe my breasts but he didn't.
Friday night, movie night, he said he was looking forward to watching a movie which I took as he was hoping for a replay. That night we did decide to watch a movie. I boldly shook things up saying to my husband how about we go down to the bedroom to watch the movie. He was confused but said ok. As we headed down, our roomie John said "goodnight" I said "aren't you coming?" I said "you can join us it's just more comfortable".
So he joined us. I was in the middle between the two men. I felt safe and emotionally secure and really enjoyed the warmth and touch of two men snuggled up to me. I was wearing one of my husband's shirts. I'd taken off my leggings before getting into bed and was nude from the waist down, purposefully. I knew what I wanted to do, knew I wanted to please both men, was nervous about being the aggressor and worried how my husband would react.
During the movie, I found my husband's cock and caressed it, then found John's and caressed his. John played with my breast nearest his. I took my top off, rolled over and took John's cock into my mouth. In my mind I felt that being nude would signal to John that he could take me if he wanted to. I sucked his cock, took my time using my mouth and tongue to pleasure him as best I could. I took a very long time and enjoyed every moan and groan I drew from him.
My husband was touching me, rubbing my ass and pussy but mostly watching. John took me, rolled me on my back and kissed me deeply, he made out with me then spent a long time sucking my breasts, caressing me, feeling my pussy, sliding his fingers in, using his tongue on my clit to make me cum, then making me cum again.
He pressed his cock against my pussy and slowly slid in, I lifted my knees spreading myself open for him to take me. He slowly slid in and out, his cock slowly grew stiffer, he fucked me faster and faster then harder and then he was close. he fucked me hard to a beautiful orgasm while my husband caressed my breasts. John kissed me when he came then lay on top of me. He rolled off, I cleaned up but when John went to leave, my husband invited him to spend the night. John watched my husband and I have sex and participated through some kissing and touching.
After that night, we had a three way relationship where I was often with both men either together or individually. I loved giving John head-he enjoyed it so much. They were both great lovers and being available to both was very fulfilling for me.
John ended up moving to another state chasing his career and my husband and I were once again monogamous but that didn't last. We've brought others into our relationship, both men and women and hopefully will continue to do so.
I enjoy meeting new people, becoming close, seeing where the relationship will bring us and if it follows a certain path reveling in the physical and emotional impact it brings. The first time I have sex with another person always provides a powerful emotional and physical boost.
That's my somewhat unconventional confession my thanks for listening.
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