Sex Confession #5158 | Adult Confessions

- I Hate My Neighbor -

I live in a community where there are numerous "older" residents who maintain "ornamental" lawns, composed of non-indigenous grasses that require a lot of tending. It seems to be a local custom that has evolved into a competition to see who can keep their "ornamental" lawn the most weed-free and green for the longest period of time, and since a lot of these fine folks are retirees, they have a lot of time on their hands. These residents typically overwater, that is, beyond what the grass requires to maintain its green lustre, from March well into November, the local climate being dry and warm. This overwatering is not only wasteful, but causes the sidewalks and adjacent driveways to errode where the excess runoff accumulates.
This really begins to effect me in the following way:
The prevaling southerly winds blow the leaves from my trees (serving the useful purpose of providing shade), onto the neighbor's "ornamental" lawn, which they find exaggeratedly annoying.
From my POV, the leaves are disintegrating by the time they are blown onto these "ornamental" lawns, and, if anything, serve as nutrient for their grass, not as messy and reeking as bovine dung, not nearly as vexing as someone's wandering pet leaving their non-productive waste; but since the purpose of the lawn gardener is to maintain a pristeen cosmetic effect, the leaves are aesthetically objectionable. Also from my POV, why doesn't the gardner simply forego the vegetation and pour concrete and paint it whatever color(s) they wish, since the desired effect is cosmetic anyway? It could easily be swept clean and the wind would blow any debris off the smooth surface quickly and effortlessly. They are dumping hundreds of dollars worth of water and care onto a non-functional carpet of vegetable material that serves no real purpose, and becoming agitated about what really seems to me to be a non problem. There are no covenants nor municipal ordinances regarding the issue....
Lawn gardener's comments?

That's Juicy! 0
Remove It! 0

# 5158 - by Anonymous / April 25, 2005

by Anonymous on Apr 25, 2005 at 12:36 PM

Hey, if they want to spend their time doing their thing, let them. If the leaves blow off your tree and onto their lawn, so what? It's not like they have any right to be mad at you about it. You don't control the winds.

No offense, but this really seems like a non-issue

(0) (0)

by Anonymous on Apr 26, 2005 at 9:25 AM

Hah, ho,ho(lol). I agree with their first respondant, who commented that it makes no particular dif what they do with their time and that it seems like a non issue. But you should hear the angry comments - one, at least, has called the police, who only told them that there was really nothing they could do(Iknow because I happened to be getting into my car to leave(leaf - sorry) at the time, and overheard the exchange(somewhat amusing in a mildly sadistic way, watching the frustrated old crank trying to get the police to arrest me, all in vain)- and, wow, if looks could kill. It just seems they would do better with festively painted concrete and forego all the obvious anguish they are experiencing. I think I can safely assure you that FOR THEM it is quite a big deal. I should point out that I do make a nominal effort to control the leaf "problem" as they fall from my trees, but the leaves have seldom dropped entirely until late Nov., and there is a slow but steady shedding of the leaves throughout the fall season.
Interestingly, if I was the vindictive sort, I could complain about the cracked and badly damaged sidewalks, which are municipal property that is being damaged by the pools of water. No, in the last vestiges of attempted neighborly decency, I go out and make purfunctory leaf control efforts - does this assuage their ire? Heck, no.
As for the other comment about the roundup attacks on their precious lawns - - - well, there is always that alternative, I suppose. I rather imagine tho, that the risk of being observed in this effort might proove expensive - consider, have you ever known of some old folks who didn't leap to the windows to observe the cause of the slightest noise? Additionally, the failure of their lawns to instantly "green up" in March would be a cause of major alarm - by April, there would be more than a few ambulances hauling of the anuerysm victims (again, somewhat satisfying in a sadistic way - but that's not really what I'm about).
I would really like to understand the mindset -
Really, are there any avid "lawn order" types out there who could give some satisfying explanation for the lawn fetish of these folks?
Where are all those gardeners who support the multimillion dollar turf and lawn care industry?

(0) (0)

by Anonymous on Apr 28, 2005 at 12:24 PM

A manicured lawn is a spiritual picture. There is a feeling of being close to nature when one brings life, to otherwise, dying grass. To have a well-maintained lawn is a picture of Godliness. It shows that the people care about living things. Maybe, it's simply a hobby. Maybe, they like the feel of thick green grass while walking barefoot or lying on their backs watching a star show.

There are many reasons why people keep their yards maintained. Some people may feel that it's the right thing to do in keeping the neighborhood up to whatever standard it is that they hold. Maybe it's so hoodlums, won't purchase a home on their street--if the hoodlums know that they don't fit in. I could write two-hundred pages on the theory of why people maintain their lawn.

Why are you worried about it anyway? They don't seem to be bothering you with your leaves blowing onto their lawn. Who cares?

(0) (0)

by Anonymous on Apr 29, 2005 at 11:18 PM

Don't be such a namby pamby.
If it's just a few of them, then the Roundup idea is not so bad.
Still, I think something more along the lines of having a friend come over late at night with his dog to poop in their yards for a few weeks would be more appropriate!

(0) (0)

by Anonymous on May 8, 2005 at 10:02 AM

I think you have a definite point in part of your first paragraph.

The lawn as symbolism - a type of western "Zen Garden".

Where the argument falls apart for me is that these folks are trying to maintain these nonindigenous, labor and expense intensive statements in one of the least hospitable areas they could possibly choose - their front yards - and in a climate that is exactly where these type of lawns would never survive without intensive care.
It just seems so counterintuitive and wrongheaded to place such an object of devotion in an area that is almost like a common - frequented by passing strangers and their animal companions, the traffic and noise of the street and blowing debris of all sorts.
It would seem a more private, dedicated area like a BACK yard would be more conducive to quiet thought and reflection and night time sojourns for star gazing, and the aforementioned anguish experienced by the few remaining neighborhood lawn gardeners would be eliminated, or at least be confined to their backyards, where my leaves almost never accumulate anyway, and I can either ignore or appreciate their dedicated efforts, without their attempts at being made to feel that I am the sole contributor to the general malaise they think accosts their gardening efforts.
Additionally, if they aren't overwatering out in front, the continued disintegration of the sidewalk won't continue.

The second part of your response isn't as compelling. The hoodlums you mention will move in regardless of the landscaping mores of adjacent homes, and this is a readily observable condition. There are more than a few successful hoodlums living in upscale areas, certainly at least some of my other neighbors would qualify for the title - but they are a topic for some future post.

What I am gleaning from the lawn (non)issue is that it is simply what has "Been Done" for the last 50-60 years and it is a willful attempt through direct pressure to conform to what is arguably an unreasonable standard - or risk ostracism from the "old guard" of the neighborhood.
What they fail to see is their obvious wastefulness, misspent effort and the very real destruction they are causing to the sidewalk, which serves a much more useful purpose than their ornamental lawns.
I see their attitudes as either somewhat comical or mildly aggravating according to my mood, and overall, rather unreasonable.
Their attempts to enforce conformity, I see as quaint.

They have no legal recourse, and can only get their bloodpressure elevated and their bowels in an uproar over - essentially - nothing.

(0) (0)

by Anonymous on Mar 29, 2011 at 3:06 AM

Bottom line about the leaves is that they raise the ph level in the soil and cause acidic conditions in the soil. Dog feces is better if you could control the rate of dispersion. Animal urine has an extreme level of ureah that in proper doses is beneficial, but in thus case causes the grass to grow its self to death. If you were to compost the leaves you could create nutrient rich soil to spread lightly in the lawn. This would also help to control the thatch layer that causes drought damage and encourages grub worms. Moles, despite what most people believe base their diet on earthworms that are present year round, rather than Grubs that only occur in large quantity in certain situations. And as a person working for the biggest name in lawn care, I cam assure you that 10sqf of healthy lawn provides as much oxygen annually as one 50ft tree. So you can see how these healthy lawns are doing much to convert green house gas into healthy air for you and your children. So please hire an American professional today to help the environment and your local economy.

(0) (0)

Over 75,650 Adult Confessions Shared!

Comments

by Anonymous on Apr 25, 2005 at 12:36 PM

by Anonymous on Apr 25, 2005 at 11:32 PM

by Anonymous on Apr 26, 2005 at 9:25 AM

by Anonymous on Apr 28, 2005 at 12:24 PM

by Anonymous on Apr 29, 2005 at 11:18 PM

by Anonymous on May 8, 2005 at 10:02 AM

by Anonymous on Mar 29, 2011 at 3:06 AM

Comment this

Top Sex Confessions

Popular Confessions