What Have I Become?

I can't tell anyone about this so i am writing about something i still can't believe. I got divorced about 7 years ago and after bad dating and all the drama i finally just gave up. During this last year with the pandemic still going on there was not much to do so i started jogging every other day and working out every other day to stay busy. The park where i jog is huge and there are hundreds of people there everyday. There was one man that always seemed to be there and he always said hello when we saw each other and one day i stopped and we struck up a conversation. He was a little older than i was but in terrific shape and soon we were meeting and doing our jogging together. Our conversations were pretty normal and it soon came around to my divorce and his soon to be divorce and we were open with each other. Then we talked about dating and of course he wasn't because of his divorce and i told him i was tired of the dating game and all the drama and was no longer interested. One afternoon on a Saturday we met and did our jogging and he asked if i had plans for the evening and i told him i did so he said we should get together sometime and when we got back to the cars he gave me his number and said to think about us getting together for coffee or a drink some evening. At first i though it would be nice to get together and the more i thought about it i gave him a call and said i would love to but maybe the following week. We met at the park the following Monday and we jogged and talked about getting together Saturday and i could tell by his tone that he was excited and so was i. So on the way home i really started thinking about things and when i got home i called him and expressed to him how excited i was to spend an afternoon or evening with him. He said he would like if we could make an evening of it and i agreed. Im not naive and i kept thinking about us together and to my surprise i was really getting excited! So we met on the Thursday before and went for our jog and then he hit me with the question...........was i bi-sexual and have i ever entertained the thought of being with another man? I kept jogging and said no i never have not until now and we got back to the car and i told him i would see him Saturday night and that i was really looking forward to it. Riding home my head was spinning and i never had these sensations before but something was coming over me and i was embracing it! So we talked Saturday morning and i asked him what he wanted me to bring and he said a few bottles of wine would be nice, a few bottles? Then he said if i felt like i may have had too much i could spend the night if i wanted to. At that very moment i knew i was going to be there until the next morning. So that evening around 9:00 i showed up wine in hand and i was so nervous and excited at the same time. He opened the door and i'm not sure what came over me so i put down the bottles and we gave each other an incredible hug. The feeling of being hugged by another man that way sent waves of excitement through me and i loved it! So into the kitchen where we chatted and opened the first bottle of pinot noir and turned on the tv and we both sat on the couch enjoying our glass of wine. After the first bottle i was more relaxed and he came back with the second bottle and sat very close to me and poured me another glass. That's when it happened i started to feel myself wanting him to kiss me or something and that's exactly what he did, first on the cheek then on my lips. He asked if that was ok and i couldn't tell him yes fast enough, his arms around me and mine around him i felt my manhood slipping away and i was fine with that. Then he excused himself and when he came back he was wearing nothing but a robe and i couldn't take my eyes off of him. He could see that i was admiring him and i didn't care and he sat on the couch and opened up his robe. That was the first time in my life i was looking at another man and wanting him with all my heart. He then asked if this is what i really wanted and i said yes and was on on my knees looking up at him as i touched his cock and bent down to kiss it. He layed his head back and i slowly lowered my head down on his hard cock and at that moment i was in heaven! Being new at this i wasn't sure exactly what to do but watched enough to know how to please. he was coaching me and telling me how good it felt and i wanted to know that i could make him cum! It wasn't long after that he started to tense up and said he was going to cum...........and he did all over his thighs. He said i did incredible for the first time and i loved hearing that! I didn't have too much to drink so i left after that and on the way home i felt weird but also loved the feeling! i called him when i got home and he asked if we could get together again next saturday and i agreed!