I Don't Get Anything Out Of Sex

The older I got the less interest I had in the opposite sex. I never dated in high school and in college I concentrated on my studies. My mother asked me if there was something I wasn't telling her, was I abused or r**ed, was it girls, did I like girls. No, nope and nope. I was ok being alone. I had friends, female friends, males were at best acquaintances or relatives.

a sex therapist told my mother I was probably asexual but she couldn't say for sure until she talked to me. I wasn't interested. I went to work after college at a well known company and did fairly well, got promoted and got raises. The head of legal asked for me and I moved to his department with a raise and was sent to school to learn enough to become a paralegal. I was 27.

I started going to this bar a block from my place where this man offered to pay me. That's how I met this man who insisted on putting his hands on me. By that I mean sexually, groping me and feeling me up. To my surprise I liked it even if I didn't like him. The sex act was a big zero. But the anticipation was a different matter. I started letting him buy me drinks but I didn't go with him unless he offered to pay. Again the waiting and the anticipation was better than the sex. If he got physical, groped me, felt me up before the act I liked that, not so much the sex act.

I haven't tried it with another girl. I'm sort of the girlfriend of this man. He doesn't know my parents and they don't know about him. I am very aware that something in me doesn't work, I don't have an emotional attachment to him.