More Bi Than I Thought

I’m married to my HS sweetheart and she knows I did some stuff with guys in my jr high days. She was cool about and I always acted so embarrassed about the time I was caught sucking my friends dick. She thinks I was just experimenting and I was , so that was the story. So 12 years later and we are married a few years and I want to suck my friends dick so bad I cry about it when she’s asleep. Oh and I jerk off on the couch in the dark imagining him consoling me and making me cum.
I’m getting to a bad place, I sucked a skater guys cock in the park the other day and I’m going back in a few minutes to see if he’s there this afternoon. It’s not him, it’s that he is the type, the look of my friend back home. His dick isn’t quite as big but it’s nice.
I call my friend sometimes late at night after some drinks and he helps me get off. I miss his actual dick, it is beautiful, so much bigger than mine. I loved holding them together and feeling so sub to his fat dick. When his got soo much longer and thicker I just felt it was my duty to worship his dick. I miss slapping it back and forth on my cheeks.