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Anything Goes
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Straight Male / 64
The Dick Barometer Theory
I was in my early twenties, hasty marriage over , I was living the life of a Jack the lad in my own flat. A mile from where I grew up and my teenage haunts, and a mile closer to town where I went out to pubs, clubs, gigs etc. There were a few friends with benefits as they say, nothing serious.
I lived in a block and a couple of floors down lived a husband and wife Mel and Jane, I knew him to nod to at the local, and had worked in the same building as him a couple of years before. I knew her to nod to from the local pub where she was second in command to the landlady , worked the bar, cleaner bits of everything. He Mel was a bit straight laced, liked fishing and folk music, helped in the church, went away with the scouts. She Jane was a bit of-a hippy , happy go lucky, looked like Janice Joplin , who I found out later she adored.
The pub was my local growing up, old coaching house on a main road, first legal pint, still going in if not going uptown, strictly run by the landlady Kathrine everybody called her Kat, she inherited the pub and stables at the back when he husband Stan died about six months ago. Stan was the son of a local farming and business family, he brought Kat home and installed her in the run down Farmers Arms spending his inheritance , and was shunned by the family cause Kat had some kind of shady past and worse still came from Yorkshire.
But she’d made this run down pub into a complete success and turned the stables behind into another success with local kids stabling their ponies. She was the complete pub landlady, ran a great house, nobody cheeked her, she had respect, and as quite capable of dealing with trouble. Jane on the other hand was the other side of the pub , happy , smiley, hippy along with a couple of other staff a friendly local pub. Kat let Jane set her own hours around Mel’s shifts and child and it all seemed to be very normal and still rural.
One morning with a mate of mine we had the bonnet up on my Mini, smoking a joint. When Mel says “ hello having trouble” we scrabble to hide the joint, “don’t worry”he says “not gonna tell” and adjusts the timing on the car and cures the problem, then asks if we’d like a coffee. My mate says no and I say OK and we go to his flat, Jane makes the coffee and I offer to roll a joint, both readily agree, so we share a coffee and a smoke, turns out she likes a smoke and lost their contact ask me to get them some and I agree I’ll deliver when I get it.
That’s how it started, I would drop it off, have a coffee, a smoke and get to know them. They were so different apart from the weed he was straight, god fearing and boring, where she was bohemian and funny.
Mel was a man of obsessions, everything he did had to be to the limit, he made his own fishing lures, then went out all day to use them, he was also a camera, photographer, used his bathroom as a darkroom, in my getting to know them she complained about these obsessions, kinda laughed them off but , a dissatisfied I couldn’t put my finger on attitude.
Then one day I go round with their order, she puts the kettle on I roll a joint and as we drink coffee and smoke she rolls her eyes as she mocks is him sitting in the bathroom exposing his negatives, as he appears, says hi, and that he has to go out for a chemical or something, she sighs and off he goes. In an attempt to make light I ask “ does he never expose your negatives” she answers “yea would you like to see them” and leaves the room.
When she comes back she hands me some black and white photos, and stands there as I look at them, the first is her in a typical for the time topless photo, she’s was slight so little Pert titties, the next stood upright full frontal nude , with shaved pussy, and the last a wide open pussy shot. I was completely turned on by the situation. Then she said , looking at my hard cock in my jeans, “ I see you like what you see” “yes I said” as she put her hand on my cock and said “you’ve seen me, can I see you” then unzipped my jeans and released the biggest hard on I’d ever had, then sucked the end , then said, he will be back soon, so put it away but if your really interested he’s on nights, so come back at nine tonight, with that she kissed the tip, and tucked it back in my pants. I couldn’t wait , I was back at nine that night, and was about to learn a lot more about sexuality.
I knocked on her door at 9 - 10 Jane or Jan as as everyone called her over her love of Janis Joplin opened the door “Hi glad you came, you must have liked what you saw, I did get inside before your seen” I followed her down the hall into the living room, asked if I wanted a drink while we have a chat she said, brought me a beer and herself a coffee, I was to find out she was a coffee addict always wired on it. As we shared a joint she said she just wanted to set a few ground rules. Then in a very matter of fact way said that we both knew we were here for sex fun, not an affair she was happy with her husband apart from sex as he was boring. He looked after her and their little girl, they had had to get married, but he was not adventurous and as soon as he got hard he came, so she liked a bit of sex fun on the side, but kept secret, any questions?
I said yea, a bit taken back by her honesty, I’m ok with that I said, how we gonna go about this?
She suggested we play a kind of strip poker, first losing clothes then paying the other a sex forfeit or a true confession or admitting a fantasy. I said OK, she said good and produced a pack of cards.
Keep it easy, she splits the pack sits on the floor pulling me down and puts a card face down on the carpet, lowest looses, idi the same, she turned hers over it was an eight, I turned mine and it was three, great she said, take your jeans off. I stood up and out of my Levi so excited I was getting hard, mmmm nice cock she said, that’s improved the view, I lost my shirt in the next go, so was there naked with a real hard on now. She lost her blouse, small but firm tits, then her jeans and I lost my socks before she lost her knickers, there’s we were naked, and a high ly charged erotic atmosphere, she lost the next snap and said I’ll have a question, I asked why she shaved her fanny, oohi like dirty words she said, then , I shave it cause I don’t have much it’s untidy and I feel cleaner, plus it’s nice for the person licking it. I lost , said I’ll have a question, and she asked if she could shave my cock and balls, I agreed, and she had me covered in shaving foam and was working away with a safety razor like an expert, handling me got me even more excited , holding my cock she said an experienced friend of hers had told her to use a man’s cock like a barometer the harder it is the closer to true desire, and you seem to be liking this a lot. I answered who wouldn’t be excited by a naked girl shaving his cock. She made a lovely smooth cock and balls , even tested the smoothness with her tongue, love it, she said, bit kinky, and laid down a card. Fun shouldn’t be rushed she said.
What she’d just done, and the nonchalant way she’d handle it all had me hairless and hard as rock.
She lost the next deal and picked a forfeit, I asked to lick her shaved fanny and sit on my face, hardly a forfeit she said and straggled over my face, are you going to lick a fanny? A pussy or a c**t she asked, c**t I said ,right answer she said , give my c**t it’s first cum, and shoved it in my face, I found her clit and started to work on it with my tongue, as she moaned in pleasure, it didn’t take long before she
Had a shuddering orgasm on my face and coming in streams. Look at you covered in c**t juice she said and licked some of her own cum off my face, whilst holding my cock, is it a cock or nob or dick I asked ,its a dick now. That was good thanks I’m hoping to have a couple more of them tonight she said, let’s have a drink and a joint , so we did.
While I rolled the joint she toyed with my still stiff cock, I love playing with a stiff, and knowing i caused it, she skilfully handled it never letting me come, but still exciting it.
They she said get back on the sofa and we’ll play dick barometer, sitting cross legged opposite each other on the sofa, whilst still massaging my stiff she explained, how her mate says you can find every man’s quirk she by his dicks reaction, so she was going to examine my turn one and fantasies by playing with my dick, her first two questions were do you like me stroking your cock? And do you enjoy talking dirty, then told me I liked them both as she felt my reaction in my cock, I had an aching hard on but was enjoying the torment. Then she asked as she manipulated my tackle. What was the best bit so far. I said when she was pleasuring herself on my face and she kept fingering herself. Oh wow she said me too but I didn’t want to steal your thunder, no I said it turns me on, knowing that I’ve turned you on so much you want to wank I’m glad to help with my tongue. Lie down she said sat on my chest and started to frig herself right over me as I licked at the delicious fluids She brought her self off twice right in my face then moved down and impaled herself on my rock hard cock. She brought herself off using it and her fingers as I hit a huge orgasm we came together and crashed back to the carpet . Finally she said that was great I hope we are going to play again, too right I agreed, as we dressed and I got ready to leave she said that her husband was on his last nights for a month, but if I wanted to play again tomorrow night come at the same time and if you’ve got any porn bring it to turn us on, at that she dropped to her knees grabbed my cock and sucked me to another orgasm , cum running from her mouth she urged me to come back tomorrow for more fun, and told me to bring any porn I had, I went home thinking of tomorrows fun.
I lived in a block and a couple of floors down lived a husband and wife Mel and Jane, I knew him to nod to at the local, and had worked in the same building as him a couple of years before. I knew her to nod to from the local pub where she was second in command to the landlady , worked the bar, cleaner bits of everything. He Mel was a bit straight laced, liked fishing and folk music, helped in the church, went away with the scouts. She Jane was a bit of-a hippy , happy go lucky, looked like Janice Joplin , who I found out later she adored.
The pub was my local growing up, old coaching house on a main road, first legal pint, still going in if not going uptown, strictly run by the landlady Kathrine everybody called her Kat, she inherited the pub and stables at the back when he husband Stan died about six months ago. Stan was the son of a local farming and business family, he brought Kat home and installed her in the run down Farmers Arms spending his inheritance , and was shunned by the family cause Kat had some kind of shady past and worse still came from Yorkshire.
But she’d made this run down pub into a complete success and turned the stables behind into another success with local kids stabling their ponies. She was the complete pub landlady, ran a great house, nobody cheeked her, she had respect, and as quite capable of dealing with trouble. Jane on the other hand was the other side of the pub , happy , smiley, hippy along with a couple of other staff a friendly local pub. Kat let Jane set her own hours around Mel’s shifts and child and it all seemed to be very normal and still rural.
One morning with a mate of mine we had the bonnet up on my Mini, smoking a joint. When Mel says “ hello having trouble” we scrabble to hide the joint, “don’t worry”he says “not gonna tell” and adjusts the timing on the car and cures the problem, then asks if we’d like a coffee. My mate says no and I say OK and we go to his flat, Jane makes the coffee and I offer to roll a joint, both readily agree, so we share a coffee and a smoke, turns out she likes a smoke and lost their contact ask me to get them some and I agree I’ll deliver when I get it.
That’s how it started, I would drop it off, have a coffee, a smoke and get to know them. They were so different apart from the weed he was straight, god fearing and boring, where she was bohemian and funny.
Mel was a man of obsessions, everything he did had to be to the limit, he made his own fishing lures, then went out all day to use them, he was also a camera, photographer, used his bathroom as a darkroom, in my getting to know them she complained about these obsessions, kinda laughed them off but , a dissatisfied I couldn’t put my finger on attitude.
Then one day I go round with their order, she puts the kettle on I roll a joint and as we drink coffee and smoke she rolls her eyes as she mocks is him sitting in the bathroom exposing his negatives, as he appears, says hi, and that he has to go out for a chemical or something, she sighs and off he goes. In an attempt to make light I ask “ does he never expose your negatives” she answers “yea would you like to see them” and leaves the room.
When she comes back she hands me some black and white photos, and stands there as I look at them, the first is her in a typical for the time topless photo, she’s was slight so little Pert titties, the next stood upright full frontal nude , with shaved pussy, and the last a wide open pussy shot. I was completely turned on by the situation. Then she said , looking at my hard cock in my jeans, “ I see you like what you see” “yes I said” as she put her hand on my cock and said “you’ve seen me, can I see you” then unzipped my jeans and released the biggest hard on I’d ever had, then sucked the end , then said, he will be back soon, so put it away but if your really interested he’s on nights, so come back at nine tonight, with that she kissed the tip, and tucked it back in my pants. I couldn’t wait , I was back at nine that night, and was about to learn a lot more about sexuality.
I knocked on her door at 9 - 10 Jane or Jan as as everyone called her over her love of Janis Joplin opened the door “Hi glad you came, you must have liked what you saw, I did get inside before your seen” I followed her down the hall into the living room, asked if I wanted a drink while we have a chat she said, brought me a beer and herself a coffee, I was to find out she was a coffee addict always wired on it. As we shared a joint she said she just wanted to set a few ground rules. Then in a very matter of fact way said that we both knew we were here for sex fun, not an affair she was happy with her husband apart from sex as he was boring. He looked after her and their little girl, they had had to get married, but he was not adventurous and as soon as he got hard he came, so she liked a bit of sex fun on the side, but kept secret, any questions?
I said yea, a bit taken back by her honesty, I’m ok with that I said, how we gonna go about this?
She suggested we play a kind of strip poker, first losing clothes then paying the other a sex forfeit or a true confession or admitting a fantasy. I said OK, she said good and produced a pack of cards.
Keep it easy, she splits the pack sits on the floor pulling me down and puts a card face down on the carpet, lowest looses, idi the same, she turned hers over it was an eight, I turned mine and it was three, great she said, take your jeans off. I stood up and out of my Levi so excited I was getting hard, mmmm nice cock she said, that’s improved the view, I lost my shirt in the next go, so was there naked with a real hard on now. She lost her blouse, small but firm tits, then her jeans and I lost my socks before she lost her knickers, there’s we were naked, and a high ly charged erotic atmosphere, she lost the next snap and said I’ll have a question, I asked why she shaved her fanny, oohi like dirty words she said, then , I shave it cause I don’t have much it’s untidy and I feel cleaner, plus it’s nice for the person licking it. I lost , said I’ll have a question, and she asked if she could shave my cock and balls, I agreed, and she had me covered in shaving foam and was working away with a safety razor like an expert, handling me got me even more excited , holding my cock she said an experienced friend of hers had told her to use a man’s cock like a barometer the harder it is the closer to true desire, and you seem to be liking this a lot. I answered who wouldn’t be excited by a naked girl shaving his cock. She made a lovely smooth cock and balls , even tested the smoothness with her tongue, love it, she said, bit kinky, and laid down a card. Fun shouldn’t be rushed she said.
What she’d just done, and the nonchalant way she’d handle it all had me hairless and hard as rock.
She lost the next deal and picked a forfeit, I asked to lick her shaved fanny and sit on my face, hardly a forfeit she said and straggled over my face, are you going to lick a fanny? A pussy or a c**t she asked, c**t I said ,right answer she said , give my c**t it’s first cum, and shoved it in my face, I found her clit and started to work on it with my tongue, as she moaned in pleasure, it didn’t take long before she
Had a shuddering orgasm on my face and coming in streams. Look at you covered in c**t juice she said and licked some of her own cum off my face, whilst holding my cock, is it a cock or nob or dick I asked ,its a dick now. That was good thanks I’m hoping to have a couple more of them tonight she said, let’s have a drink and a joint , so we did.
While I rolled the joint she toyed with my still stiff cock, I love playing with a stiff, and knowing i caused it, she skilfully handled it never letting me come, but still exciting it.
They she said get back on the sofa and we’ll play dick barometer, sitting cross legged opposite each other on the sofa, whilst still massaging my stiff she explained, how her mate says you can find every man’s quirk she by his dicks reaction, so she was going to examine my turn one and fantasies by playing with my dick, her first two questions were do you like me stroking your cock? And do you enjoy talking dirty, then told me I liked them both as she felt my reaction in my cock, I had an aching hard on but was enjoying the torment. Then she asked as she manipulated my tackle. What was the best bit so far. I said when she was pleasuring herself on my face and she kept fingering herself. Oh wow she said me too but I didn’t want to steal your thunder, no I said it turns me on, knowing that I’ve turned you on so much you want to wank I’m glad to help with my tongue. Lie down she said sat on my chest and started to frig herself right over me as I licked at the delicious fluids She brought her self off twice right in my face then moved down and impaled herself on my rock hard cock. She brought herself off using it and her fingers as I hit a huge orgasm we came together and crashed back to the carpet . Finally she said that was great I hope we are going to play again, too right I agreed, as we dressed and I got ready to leave she said that her husband was on his last nights for a month, but if I wanted to play again tomorrow night come at the same time and if you’ve got any porn bring it to turn us on, at that she dropped to her knees grabbed my cock and sucked me to another orgasm , cum running from her mouth she urged me to come back tomorrow for more fun, and told me to bring any porn I had, I went home thinking of tomorrows fun.
- That's Juicy! 22
- Remove It! 2
