Cucumber Curiosity

Since I can't t get the real thing without compromising my identity, health, or marriage, I tried a vegetable. A few weeks ago I took a large 12" cucumber from the refrigerator. I warmed it up then lubed it up and tried to stick it in butt it was too big. So I just used it to massage my hole while I jacked off. It felt so good butt, wish I could have taken it all in butt I was too tight.
I'm an overweight married man with a wife I have loved for 3 decades. Sex is almost non-existent but I need more sexual action than she desires.