I Feel Used And Abused

Started a new relationship with this guy and things were going great. He took me out on so many dates, showered me with g*fts, like everything to win a girl's heart.

We were hanging out one night on his bed watching Rings of Power. He turned to me, we started making out, he touched me all over. I just froze, I wasn't ready for it. He started to undress me, then asked, "What's wrong?" I told him I wasn't ready for that next step of the relationship and he got angry. He said I must be in it just for the g*fts and free food, I'm just leading him on. I kept telling him no that's not it, but he was not having it. I caved and offered to give him a blowjob. He replied, "That's a good start," and undid his pants.

I awkwardly took his cock in my hand, gave it a few rubs. I slowly lowered my head, opened my mouth, and let the tip of his cock into my mouth. He said, "God you're fucking slow," and pushed my head down until his cock jabbed at my throat. He then continued to facefuck me until he came, he shot everything into my mouth. I wasn't ready and gagged, it forced the cum out of my nose. He told me to go clean up. After I washed up, we continued to watch Rings of Power while cuddling, but I couldn't focus.

It's been a few weeks now and after every date, he facefucks me. I'm just mentally preparing for when he does fuck me...