True Story: Twenty years ago, a buddy of mine goes to Brazil on a business trip. Every night he sees this stunning girl in the clubs. Tall, slender but very curvy in the right places, black curly hair down to her ass, golden brown skin, beestung lips. The works in other words. It takes him a week to work up the nerve to try his limited Portuguese on her and even then, he has to down six of those rum, sugar, and lime cocktails before he does. They dance and then go up to his hotel room. He knows they have sex, but the details are a little fuzzy because he passes out. He wakes up the next morning alone. His wallet is on the bed, but all the money is still in it. Weird right?
Now, this was before AIDS was a big worry in Brazil, so he just is a little worried about taking home herpes, the clap, or something. But he goes back to the States and is clean as a whistle. Couple months go by and he gets a letter from the girl. Actually, she has a lawyer friend who speaks good English write it. Turns out, she swiped his business card from his wallet. The letter says she's pregnant and underage. If he doesn't pay up, she'll send a letter to his company which does a lot of business in Brazil. Worse still, his father-in-law is on the board of the company. They'll fire him. And he'll pay a fortune in alimony.
Well, my buddy is half-horrified, half-elated. He was getting older (38 then) and his wife was showing no signs of ever getting pregnant or wanting to adopt. So he gladly writes a generous annual check and in return only asks for monthly pictures and that the kid is named after his dad if a boy or his mom if a girl.
This goes on for many years. It's the big secret of his life. He even has a separate bank account and rented mailbox set up so his wife never finds out. Then, his wife is suddenly killed in an auto accident. After a decent period of time, he figures he'll go down to Brazil, see his kid, and if the mom is still as good looking maybe he'll marry her.
He goes down to Brazil and finds the kid and mom. Only, no surprise, the kid is actually the youngest brother of the girl and the girl is actually a guy. That's right, he slept with a transvestite and never knew it. Plus, he gave her about $50,000 over the years to support a kid that wasn't his.
Now, you'd think any red-blooded American male would turn to violence. Only my buddy is so attached to the idea of the kid and the mom that he pays for her sex change operation, marries her, adopts the kid, and moves to Brazil!
Now, this was before AIDS was a big worry in Brazil, so he just is a little worried about taking home herpes, the clap, or something. But he goes back to the States and is clean as a whistle. Couple months go by and he gets a letter from the girl. Actually, she has a lawyer friend who speaks good English write it. Turns out, she swiped his business card from his wallet. The letter says she's pregnant and underage. If he doesn't pay up, she'll send a letter to his company which does a lot of business in Brazil. Worse still, his father-in-law is on the board of the company. They'll fire him. And he'll pay a fortune in alimony.
Well, my buddy is half-horrified, half-elated. He was getting older (38 then) and his wife was showing no signs of ever getting pregnant or wanting to adopt. So he gladly writes a generous annual check and in return only asks for monthly pictures and that the kid is named after his dad if a boy or his mom if a girl.
This goes on for many years. It's the big secret of his life. He even has a separate bank account and rented mailbox set up so his wife never finds out. Then, his wife is suddenly killed in an auto accident. After a decent period of time, he figures he'll go down to Brazil, see his kid, and if the mom is still as good looking maybe he'll marry her.
He goes down to Brazil and finds the kid and mom. Only, no surprise, the kid is actually the youngest brother of the girl and the girl is actually a guy. That's right, he slept with a transvestite and never knew it. Plus, he gave her about $50,000 over the years to support a kid that wasn't his.
Now, you'd think any red-blooded American male would turn to violence. Only my buddy is so attached to the idea of the kid and the mom that he pays for her sex change operation, marries her, adopts the kid, and moves to Brazil!
