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Straight But No Sex

My wife is going through menopause. We haven't had sex in over 5 weeks. Before that is was even longer.
She doesn't like talking about it either. When or if we do she tells me she wants me. Her words don't explain her actions...or lack thereof.
As a Christian what am I to do?
I have thought about other ways to satisfy myself beyond masterbation.

15
# 62740 - by Lonely in Lynchburg, VA / December 20, 2022
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Comments

Anonymous

by Anonymous on Dec 20, 2022 at 6:16 PM

What has being a christian got to do with anything

Communication is what's required -- if she doesn't want to talk to you -- tell her her non participation in talking may cost her a marriage.......

(3)  (0)
Anonymous

by Anonymous on Dec 20, 2022 at 6:22 PM

Nah.....We've been together far too long to end the marriage. Too many good memories and kids. I'd rather find an alternative....a very safe discreet alternative.

(2)  (0)
Anonymous

by Anonymous on Dec 20, 2022 at 7:26 PM

Had the same problem, stayed with her for the same reason. Now I wish that I had the courage to just divorce her.

(3)  (0)
Anonymous

by Anonymous on Dec 20, 2022 at 7:29 PM

To the last poster.
What are you doing now? Have you found alternative sex?

(0)  (0)
Anonymous

by Anonymous on Dec 20, 2022 at 7:52 PM

Going through the same thing right now. Menopause sucks. When we do have sex she just lays there and tenses up. It takes a while for her to get wet. She doesn't want any vaginal penetration. She said her Dr told her that vaginal sex during menopause will hurt, so she doesn't want any penetration. She also says that she has no sexual urges. If I start and try She'll then blow me to completion, then she rubs out an orgasm, rolls over and goes to sleep. I tried to eat her pussy our whole marriage but she is such a control freak, she won't let me go down on her. I even told her to just sit on my face and fuck my face. Nope. To the original poster... It's many weeks in between our "love making" and it is very frustrating and I feel your pain. I'm not Christian and I think about what other avenues I can take. I love her and our family but I need physical love that she's not giving me.

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Anonymous

by Anonymous on Dec 20, 2022 at 8:28 PM

As a fellow Christian, I would say that praying for her should be at the top of the liist. Talk to her. Im in the same boat. I have been talking to other guys going through the same thing. What they told me is give her some time and space and she'll come around. As men, we don't know what women go through at this stage of life. So, talk to your pastor or guys at church for support. Don't do anything rash. Stay strong in your faith.

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Anonymous

by Anonymous on Dec 21, 2022 at 12:21 AM

I had a similar situation but with my husband who was going through some mental health issues over the past two years. I felt very very similar to you, and it was so conflicting because I loved my husband and wanted to be with him sexually, but he wasn’t fulfilling my needs for valid reasons.

For what it’s worth, the want to have sex with someone not your spouse is very very very very normal. There is no reason to feel ashamed about it. (Now, what you choose to do with that normal feeling is up to you!) Whatever you decide, I encourage that you be open, honest, and vulnerable with your wife. Sex is ONE aspect of a marriage. Maybe take this time to learn how to engage intimately that isn’t penis-in-hole, like dry humping, heavy petting, teasing. If that’s too much, try just holding hands or hugging lol you have one life, why not hug her more?

We (still sometimes) sometimes have sex and imitate knowing neither or us might cum, but it’s still a good time and a nice dick slash pussy massage!

Good luck. What you’re experiencing is normal. You’re doing just fine.

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Anonymous

by Anonymous on Dec 21, 2022 at 3:18 AM

Butt fuck her till she likes it

(2)  (1)
Anonymous

by Anonymous on Dec 21, 2022 at 4:52 AM

Fellow Christian here. It speaks volumes of our natural humanity that we're reading this site. That out of the way, there is a lot of value in empathy. My wife went through menopause without ever telling me and I was so disappointed that I did not have the opportunity to walk with her through that phase. Worse, I was internally distraught that I'd been so unattentive that I hadn't even noticed. Yes, there were changes but apparently I was so distant that when I finally noticed there were no pads in our bathroom (hilariously for wanting to use for minor issue with my bum) she said, "Oh I went through menopause years ago." My point is, I sought to support my wife through this phase, and entirely missed it. Use this opportunity to assure her of her beauty and affection in other ways, as another poster said.

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logan2020

by logan2020 on Dec 21, 2022 at 6:34 AM

I'll be down voted for this, I'm sure. I was a former Christian for over 30 years. Married young, had lots of kids. Wife stayed home to raise them. I was very involved in church, serving as a Sunday school teacher, worship leader, occasional pulpit speaker, etc., but I was miserable in my marriage. I tried a lot of things to make it better. Sex was rare and wife felt that anything other than missionary position sex was yucky or wrong. Eventually, my faith faltered. We divorced. I remarried, and I am far happier now than I've ever been. Close to 60 years old now.

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Anonymous

by Anonymous on Dec 21, 2022 at 8:24 AM

Well it’s kind of wrong but you could find another guy in similar situation and stroke maybe suck each other off

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Anonymous

by Anonymous on Dec 21, 2022 at 1:13 PM

Bloody Christians make me laugh……..first thing at the top of the list is to Pray for her then talk to your church leader or pastor…… coz God will help for sure!

(1)  (0)
Anonymous

by Anonymous on Dec 21, 2022 at 3:50 PM

Just remind her that the Bible tells" women to submit to the man", and give up that pussy or at least suck your hard cock ! "Pastor Bob".

(0)  (0)
AnthonyT59

by AnthonyT59 on Dec 24, 2022 at 7:12 AM

Funny how all these "Christians" are in this website lol

(1)  (0)
Anonymous

by Anonymous on Dec 26, 2022 at 9:50 PM

Christian men are needy too. I wish I lived near that guy

(0)  (0)

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