Too Loose To Date?

I'm a single mom of 4 grown children. All are out of the house and have their own places now. I have had the house to myself for a couple of years now. Been divorced for over 4 years. After the initial few months of being depressed I started feeling better about myself. I'm in decent shape. I'm 5'5" 146 lbs red hair 34C. I have always loved sex ever since I started in my teens. I married my HS sweetheart at 21and thought we would be together forever. Unfortunately he left me for his young girlfriend. It was pretty hard on me. I had sworn off men forever! I started buying all kinds of sex toys because I was still horny all the time. In the first year after my divorce I spent nearly $2000 on sec toys including a fucking machine from Ken's twisted minds. And I have 11 dildos that attach to it. I kept buying bigger and bigger ones. The feeling of getting stretched and pounded as hard and fast as I want for as long as I want was-is amazing. But just like anything else, over time I've started missing things like sucking cock and getting eaten out, or he'll, even just kissing. So for the last year or so I went on a few of the popular free dating sites and apps. Never had a problem getting a date. I still look good I think. But of the 6 men I have had sex with it always seems like a one and done. I finally asked the last guy if he just dated me until he got some pussy then went on to his next conquest. He said I think you're really pretty and you're very nice and you give great head. But please don't be upset because this is as honest I can be, you are just too loose. Fucking your pussy feels ok for a minute or two then I really can't feel a thing. You don't do anal and it's really hard for me to cum from just a blowjob.

I was floored. I thought my pussy snapped back into shape like after having a kid. But apparently I've ruined it. I turn between getting rid of the toys and letting it tighten up, or even getting surgery to tighten it up. But quite honestly I can't. I love being stuffed. I closed all my dating accounts and I think I'll just keep doing myself. I have considered finding a hung black man but I'm afraid he'll tell me the same thing. After all one of the guys I dated was pretty big.

But I miss the intimacy between a man and a woman too. Ahhhhhhhhh!!!! I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place!